The Polygamy 911
by ana on Mar.27, 2009, under my journey
Alex knew I had called Carolinah. He was extremely upset with me.
When Alex and I got home, he asked me why I had made the call. He said everything was going good in both household and then I had to make the call. Alex was very distressed, sitting in the chair in the dining room with his head in his hands. He said Carolinah asked him to come and be with her, as she was so upset. He said he was going to have to go calm her down. I asked Alex not to leave me. I was nervous and on edge. My body was trembling. I asked him to try to calm her down by way of the phone, and not to leave me.
Alex went outside and called Carolinah on her cell phone. He was out there for about forty-five minutes. I actually went outside to see if he was still there. I feared he had left for Carolinah’s house.
When Alex came back inside the house, he said Carolinah was terribly upset and he needed to go there. He said, “I care about her. I told him that I would call her and apologize. He said, “Ask her if it’s OK for me to stay with you. Tell her that you need me here.” I thought…He must be crazy. I am not going to ask that woman if my husband can stay with me.
So I called her and basically just said I was sorry. Carolinah said, “You don’t mean it, Ana.” Alex was in the background telling me to ask her if he could stay with me. I hung up the phone. Alex was angry that I hadn’t done what he had told me to do.
I had an emergency in my marriage that I am able to share with you at polygamy 411.
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As Salaamu Alaikum!
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travel 4 less!
April 17th, 2009 on 1:14 AM
This is so funny to me…
He said, “Ask her if it’s OK for me to stay with you. Tell her that you need me here.”
I must say, your husband is rather a coward. ROFL
I don’t know how to say this on your blog, because it is he that needs to realize this. You (and she) have made a HUGE sacrifice that he does not understand. In fact, I don’t know if he even CAN understand it. He needs to be MORE of a LEADER, and not try to FOLLOW two masters. A follower of women cannot be a good polygamist man. You cannot obey each other, he has to take the lead if he wants you to follow.
This phone call was probably FUN for you, because you had “control” of the situation. (Yes, you are a sadistic “freak” LOL) Wasn’t it FUN?! It was all your doing, and they both needed you! (To fix it) Isn’t it wonderful to be needed? Don’t you just love when others need you? ESPECIALLY THE MAN YOU LOVE!
That is the crux of the whole matter. When you are the only wife, you know that he needs you. But if you are no longer the only wife, you feel LESS needed. Right? Women are built to be nurturers, the comfort and caring ones, the ones who TAKE CARE OF THINGS.
Does he need you? ASK HIM!
Don’t make him choose between you and her, unless you WANT to divorce HIM! But ask him what it is that he needs you for. He needs to tell you how much he needs you, and WHY!
AND have him tell you WHY he needs her, not just things that you can do for him, but what it is about her that he likes so much, and then… (If you want this to work out for you all)
Pull out your list of her GOOD traits, and tell him what you think. And do not expect anything back in return.
That man needs to grow up and quit acting like a child with two mothers. He needs to act like a man with two wives.
Thank you for letting me comment here, good night.