Hallo Welt!
durch Anna am Apr.25, 2009, während meine Reise
Um die wahre Identität der Parteien zu schützen und treu zu bleiben mein Leben Erfahrungen, die Namen der Charaktere hier (bei Polygamie 411) sind frei erfunden; aber, meine Situation, Umstände, und Erfahrungen sind real.
Ich bin Anabellah. Du könntest mich Ana nennen. Ich habe in einer polygamen Ehe, gemäß der von vielen als Polygynie, für nur etwas mehr als zwei Jahren. Mein Mann heißt Alex. Er “married” Carolinah (Weihnachtslied) während mit mir verheiratet.&nverheirateth benutze “married” in Zitaten, einfach, weil ich war nicht bei Alex und Carolinah der Trauung. Ich habe mit niemandem, dass die Zeremonie teil sprechen, noch sah ich eine Dokumentation von ihm. Ich muss Alex das Wort, dass es aufgetreten ist zu akzeptieCarolinah; Alex, Carolinah, und ich lebe Polygamie, die rechtmäßige für mich als Muslim, für alle Absichten und Zwecke.
Ich bitte Allah um Vergebung für alles, was ich sagen kann oder hier bei Polygamie gesagt haben 411 das wäre unbeabsichtigt, oder in irgendeiner Weise andere irreführen. Meine Absicht hier bei Polygamie 411 ist es, anderen bei der Bewältigung einer Art und Weise des Lebens helfen (Polygamie) das ist gut für mich und zur gleichen Zeit habe ich es gefunden ist extrem schwierig.
Ich würde gerne mit Ihnen teilen hier wie bei Polygamie 411 Reise-und Antwort viele Ihrer Fragen, so ehrlich und so schnell wie möglich. Insha Allah, Sie teilen sich einige Ihrer Gefühle, Gedanken, und Erfahrungen mit mir und anderen, sowie.
Ich möchte daran erinnern, dass Allah machte es einem Mann erlaubt, mehr als eine Frau im Islam haben. So, Bitte beachten Sie, Polygamie 411 ist keine Polygamie bashing Blog. Ich will nicht zu machen rechtswidrig, was Allah erlaubt hat. Dies hat ein Teil meines Kampfes, wie ich Kampf mit der Wahrheit und meine persönlichen Wünsche.
Bei Polygamie 411, Ich glaube nicht,, kann nicht, und wird nicht niemandem sagen, wie die Polygamie zu praktizieren, noch werde ich beraten, ob es das Richtige für Sie. Ich kann nur mit dir, was ich haben, zu teilen erfahren, gelernt über mich, und von anderen gelernt.
Alles Lob gebührt Allah.
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Als Salamu Alaikum!
Willkommen in Polygamie 411! Unser Haus ist für Muslime und Nicht-Muslime. Es ist für jeden, der über Polygamie sprechen will, oder jemand, der in einer polygamen Ehe oder erwägt die Eingabe eines. Wir möchten mit Unternehmen. Machen Sie es sich bequem und sich der Diskussion, indem Sie einen Kommentar. Wir freuen uns auf Ihren Besuch hier bald wieder und oft.
Reise 4 weniger!
2. März, 2009 auf 8:41 PM
As salaamu Alaikum,
I have been married just shy of seven years. My husband married another woman, besides me, just a little over two years ago. I am finally beginning to be at peace with it, and actually feel very happy. That’s weird; I can smile now while writing about it instead of crying. It was a tough road and I felt like I wasn’t going to finish the journey.
We all have a tendency to place blame and rationalize why we don’t like something. The main reason we reject polygamy is because it goes against our personal desires. Immerhin, who wants to share love, especially a husband – unless we’re just tired of him, therefore encourage him to take another wife. Wenn das der Fall ist, polygamy probably wasn’t our test; something else was.
Sowieso, I’m blogging about polygamy, as I now feel I can be a whole lot more objective about it. I thank Allah SWT much for it, as He has allowed me to see my many faults, my shortcomings, and my weakness in my Faith. It has made me a better person. Insha Allah, it will help me get into Paradise.
Dies ist ein offenes Haus. Keine Notwendigkeit zu klopfen. Nur hereinspaziert.
March 3rd, 2009 auf 11:55 AM
Als Salamu Alaikum,
I contemplated divorcing Alex so many times after he married Carolinah. Allerdings, after giving it much thought, I said I was not going to give her the satisfaction of prevailing. I said I was going to win because, besides having the husband that Allah SWT has chosen for me, I would be victorious over Satan. Satan wants me to be ungrateful to Allah SWT.
Do we feel at times we would rather have no one than to share? Do we ask ourselves questions like, “Why should I have to share?” or do we say, “Not me, I’m not going to do that.” Do we sometimes become arrogant like Iblis, and let that attitude influence our feelings about polygamy?
September 9th, 2009 auf 11:57 AM
As salaamu alaikum wa rahamtullah… my dearest sister in Islaam. I am seriously struggling with this very trial as I type. My husband is intended to a sister now and I feel like I’m losing it. It consumes me constantly. I barely eat to a point where I have lost almost 30lbs in a few short months. Everyone arounds me says I look sickly and like I have suffered a major loss. To be honest this is exactly how I feel. Financially our sitution is not very good. Emotionally our marriage is unstable. I don’t want to leave my husband either even though I asked him to choose between the two. I don’t want to drive him from me I just want him to see and understand what I’m feeling and going through. Help me please!!
September 9th, 2009 auf 10:31 PM
Umm Mahmood, As Salaamu Alaikum wa rahamtuallah. I truly know the severe hurt and pain that you are suffering, as I have lived it myself. It is agonizing more than anyone can imagine without having gone through it. The significant weight loss in a few short months, and feeling constantly consumed by all that is happening to you, as your husband prepares to take another wife, if it pleases Allah SWT, are too well known to me. What you must understand is that what you are feeling is “normal”, are the usual feelings that many sisters have experienced that are in Islamic polygamous marriages. You could read many comments on the blog here and learn that you are not alone in your feelings. Perhaps many others will come forward as well so you could hear from them about their experiences.
You say you feel like you have suffered a major loss. From what I have read from other sources, and have learned here on the blog from many, what you’re feeling is real. If your husband takes another wife, you will leave behind something, whether it will be your husband all together or you will no longer have your husband all to yourself anymore. Either way, there will be a loss as you divorce or transition from monogamy to polygamy, leaving monogamy behind. I’ve heard it referred to by some that the change in your marriage is like a death of it, the marriage. I suppose that is why we grieve the way that we do. We go through the same stages in our transition from monogamy to polygamy as we do when we loose a loved one to death. We experience anger, sadness, denial, depression and much more, zum Beispiel.
The important thing for you to do is try to hold on and be strong as best you can. Turn all your attention to Allah SWT and try to remember Him, as best you can. It is important that you try to stay focused (on Allah and your trial) now at a time when it is so terribly difficult to think of anything other than your crisis situation. The important thing for you to do, as much as you can, is try to take good care of you.
You said you want your husband to understand what you are feeling and going through. I don’t really know if he can. Again I ask the question how a husband can cause his wife so much hurt and pain by taking another wife and still say he loves her. But apparently it is possible. I wouldn’t expect to get many answers from him, if I were you. Your marriage is bound to continue to be unstable for a while, but you must put your faith and trust in Allah that with hardship comes ease and things will get better if you decide to stay.
You should take into consideration that your husband probably loves you just as much as he always has, and that taking another wife does not diminish his love for you. I don’t think it would be that easy for your husband to chose between you and his new intended, otherwise he would have divorced you, if the decision was that easy for him.
You must try not to blame yourself for your husband’s decision to take another wife, although it will be difficult not to. The blame part is a stage as well. You are not to blame for his decision. You must remember that. Ich noch, 2 years and nine months later, play the blame game with myself, and have to squash it.
You’re going to be alright sister. We all are here for you!
Dies ist ein offenes Haus. Keine Notwendigkeit zu klopfen. Nur hereinspaziert.