Hello World!
prema Ana on Apr.25, 2009, vrijeme moje putovanje
Da bi zaštitili pravi identitet stranaka i ostati vjerni moj život iskustva, imena likova ovdje (na poligamiju 411) su izmišljena; međutim, moja situacija, okolnosti, i iskustva su stvarne.
Ja sam Anabellah. Možete me zvati Ana. Ja sam bio u braku poligamni, iz po mnogima višeženstvu, za samo nešto više od dvije godine. Moj suprug ime je Alex. On “married” Carolinah (Pjesma) dok je u braku s mene. Koristim &oženjenarried” u kotacije, jednostavno zato što nisam bio na Alex i Carolinah je svadbene svečanosti. Nisam razgovarao ni s kim da nazočili svečanosti, niti vidim nikakvu dokumentaciju o tome. Moram prihvatiti Alex riječ da se dogodila. Alex, Carolinah, i Carolinah poligamiji, koja je zakonito za mene kao musliman, za sve namjere i svrhe.
Molim Allaha oprost za sve što mogu reći ili imaju kazao je ovdje na poligamiju 411 koji bi nehotice, ili na bilo koji način dovesti u zabludu druge. Moja namjera ovdje na poligamiju 411 je pomoći drugima u suočavanju s načinom života (poligamija) to je dobro za mene au isto vrijeme sam ga pronašao je vrlo teško.
Htio bih podijeliti s vama ovdje na poligamiju 411 moje putovanje i odgovor mnoga vaša pitanja, kao iskreno i brže. Insha Allaha, ćete dijeliti neke svoje osjećaje, misli, i iskustva sa mnom i drugima, kao i.
Želim da zapamtite da je Allah učinio dopušteno čovjeku da ima više od jedne žene u islamu. Tako, imajte na umu poligamiji 411 nije poligamija bashing blog. Ne želim da se nezakonito ono što je Allah od zakonite. To je dio moje borbe, kao što sam bitku s Istinom i moje osobno želje.
Na poligamija 411, Ne znam, ne mogu, i neće nikome reći kako u praksi poligamije, niti ću dati savjet o tome je li prava stvar za Vas. Ja mogu samo podijeliti s vama ono što sam iskusan, naučili o sebi, i naučio od drugih.
Sve pohvale zbog Allaha.
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Kao Salaamu Alaikum!
Dobrodošli na Poligamija 411! Naš dom je za muslimane i nemuslimane. To je za svakoga tko želi razgovarati o poligamiji, ili bilo tko tko je u poligamni brak ili je s obzirom na ulazak jedne. Mi kao da tvrtka. Osjećajte se ugodno i pridružite raspravi po ostavljajući komentar. Radujemo se Vašem dolasku ovdje opet uskoro, a često i.
putovanje 4 manje!
March 2nd, 2009 na 8:41 PM
As salaamu Alaikum,
I have been married just shy of seven years. My husband married another woman, besides me, just a little over two years ago. I am finally beginning to be at peace with it, and actually feel very happy. That’s weird; I can smile now while writing about it instead of crying. It was a tough road and I felt like I wasn’t going to finish the journey.
We all have a tendency to place blame and rationalize why we don’t like something. The main reason we reject polygamy is because it goes against our personal desires. Uostalom, who wants to share love, especially a husband – unless we’re just tired of him, therefore encourage him to take another wife. If that is the case, polygamy probably wasn’t our test; something else was.
U svakom slučaju, I’m blogging about polygamy, as I now feel I can be a whole lot more objective about it. I thank Allah SWT much for it, as He has allowed me to see my many faults, my shortcomings, and my weakness in my Faith. It has made me a better person. Insha Allaha, it will help me get into Paradise.
To je otvorena kuća. Ne trebate kucati. Samo doći u.
March 3rd, 2009 na 11:55 PM
Kao Salaamu Alaikum,
I contemplated divorcing Alex so many times after he married Carolinah. Međutim, after giving it much thought, I said I was not going to give her the satisfaction of prevailing. I said I was going to win because, besides having the husband that Allah SWT has chosen for me, I would be victorious over Satan. Satan wants me to be ungrateful to Allah SWT.
Do we feel at times we would rather have no one than to share? Do we ask ourselves questions like, “Why should I have to share?” or do we say, “Not me, I’m not going to do that.” Do we sometimes become arrogant like Iblis, and let that attitude influence our feelings about polygamy?
September 9th, 2009 na 11:57 PM
As salaamu alaikum wa rahamtullah… my dearest sister in Islaam. I am seriously struggling with this very trial as I type. My husband is intended to a sister now and I feel like I’m losing it. It consumes me constantly. I barely eat to a point where I have lost almost 30lbs in a few short months. Everyone arounds me says I look sickly and like I have suffered a major loss. To be honest this is exactly how I feel. Financially our sitution is not very good. Emotionally our marriage is unstable. I don’t want to leave my husband either even though I asked him to choose between the two. I don’t want to drive him from me I just want him to see and understand what I’m feeling and going through. Help me please!!
September 9th, 2009 na 10:31 PM
Umm Mahmood, As Salaamu Alaikum wa rahamtuallah. I truly know the severe hurt and pain that you are suffering, as I have lived it myself. It is agonizing more than anyone can imagine without having gone through it. The significant weight loss in a few short months, and feeling constantly consumed by all that is happening to you, as your husband prepares to take another wife, if it pleases Allah SWT, are too well known to me. What you must understand is that what you are feeling is “normalan”, are the usual feelings that many sisters have experienced that are in Islamic polygamous marriages. You could read many comments on the blog here and learn that you are not alone in your feelings. Perhaps many others will come forward as well so you could hear from them about their experiences.
You say you feel like you have suffered a major loss. From what I have read from other sources, and have learned here on the blog from many, what you’re feeling is real. If your husband takes another wife, you will leave behind something, whether it will be your husband all together or you will no longer have your husband all to yourself anymore. Bilo kako bilo, there will be a loss as you divorce or transition from monogamy to polygamy, leaving monogamy behind. I’ve heard it referred to by some that the change in your marriage is like a death of it, brak. I suppose that is why we grieve the way that we do. We go through the same stages in our transition from monogamy to polygamy as we do when we loose a loved one to death. We experience anger, sadness, denial, depression and much more, na primjer.
The important thing for you to do is try to hold on and be strong as best you can. Turn all your attention to Allah SWT and try to remember Him, as best you can. It is important that you try to stay focused (on Allah and your trial) now at a time when it is so terribly difficult to think of anything other than your crisis situation. The important thing for you to do, as much as you can, is try to take good care of you.
You said you want your husband to understand what you are feeling and going through. I don’t really know if he can. Again I ask the question how a husband can cause his wife so much hurt and pain by taking another wife and still say he loves her. But apparently it is possible. I wouldn’t expect to get many answers from him, if I were you. Your marriage is bound to continue to be unstable for a while, but you must put your faith and trust in Allah that with hardship comes ease and things will get better if you decide to stay.
You should take into consideration that your husband probably loves you just as much as he always has, and that taking another wife does not diminish his love for you. I don’t think it would be that easy for your husband to chose between you and his new intended, otherwise he would have divorced you, if the decision was that easy for him.
You must try not to blame yourself for your husband’s decision to take another wife, although it will be difficult not to. The blame part is a stage as well. You are not to blame for his decision. You must remember that. I still, 2 years and nine months later, play the blame game with myself, and have to squash it.
You’re going to be alright sister. We all are here for you!
To je otvorena kuća. Ne trebate kucati. Samo doći u.