博士について. オマル師はメリーランドザイド.
で アン 12月20日に, 2009, 間に 一夫多妻 - 余波, セクション 2
ディーアール. オマル師はメリーランドザイド.
研究員, ISTAC, IIUM, クアラルンプール, マレーシア医師, 著者, エディタ, ozaidmd@gmail.com
ディーアール. オマルザイドは引退した救急医今研究員ISTACです (IIUM) 7月以降 2007. 彼は貢献しているエディタISTACの四半期に ニュースレター; ISTAC 's Journalにアシスタントエディタ アルSajarah と英語で様々な他の出版物. また、フリーランスのエディタ独立行政法人です, イスラム書籍信託, クアラルンプール, とEQHO通信株式会社, 国際翻訳株式会社. バンコクで. 前イスラム教へ改宗するには、 2004, ディーアール. ザイドは福音キリスト教のサラワク、東の宣教師マレーシアれた. 彼は現在、教会史の研究を行う, グノーシス主義, ミステリー宗教, 不妊カルツ, ハーメチック社会と人間開発とセクシュアリティの歴史. いくつかのエッセイや論文に加えて、, 彼はトリニティを執筆して: 神話の変態 (Penpress, ブライトン, イングランド, 2008); イブリースの手: 新世界秩序の隠し手に概要観測 (のASノルディーン, クアラルンプール, 2009). 彼の次の本, カインの信条: ローマのカルト, 脱とリビジョン教会の歴史, のASノーディーンのリリースで予定されて 2010.
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Salaamuのアライクムとして!
へようこそ一夫多妻 411! 私たちの家は、イスラム教徒と非イスラム教徒のためのものです. それは、一夫多妻について話をしたい皆のためです。, または一夫多妻婚になっているか、誰もがいずれかを入力して検討している. 我々は、会社を持つよう. 自分が快適な確認し、コメントを残して、議論に参加. 我々は再びすぐに、しばしばここを楽しみにしています.
ホテル 4 以下!
December 21st, 2009 の 5:00 PM
It is good. I thought he was born in Pakistan. May Allah forgive me. He need to Learn Islam from the correct sources Quran and Authentic Source Al Hadith Bukary and Muslim and their explanations.
June 3rd, 2010 の 3:44 午前
He became muslim less than 6 years ago and he became a researcher in islam and wrote 6 books.Where are muslim scholars?
June 3rd, 2010 の 4:03 午前
Salaamuのアライクムとして “イスラム教徒”!
“イスラム教徒” 質問, “Where are muslim scholars?” I say, We be them LOL
これは、オープンハウスです. 必要はありませんノックして. だけで来る.
June 7th, 2010 の 5:40 午前
イスラム教徒,In response to you I say I can write 6 books a year but I don’t know how much of it is according to islam and truth.
June 7th, 2010 の 1:26 PM
Valid point, Genius! ものの, it may sound like a joke, I’m serious. I don’t think you’ve commented here before. Welcome to polygamy 411! We’re glad you are here and especially thankful for your comment
これは、オープンハウスです. 必要はありませんノックして. だけで来る.
June 7th, 2010 の 2:11 PM
I’ve been curious as to what happened to Dr. して、Omar. I had the feeling that things got a little too contentious. Did he just stop writing? Did he offer you any explanation that you wish to share with us Ana?
June 7th, 2010 の 4:29 PM
ジュディス, your feelings about what happened to Dr. Omar and his absence from the blog were correct. Things did get too contentious between him and some of our readers here. He was advised on a number of occasions that he was offending many of our readers, that much of his material was sexist and was geared towards influencing others to accept his innovative views. In the best interest of the readers and the blog, I spoke with Dr. Omar and polygamy 411 barred him from commenting any further here. I’m wishing him the best at his new home. In all fairness to Dr. して、Omar, if he reads this comment and wishes to respond to it, I would allow that one comment through.
There are many readers and commentators here from various religions and backgrounds. We encourage all to share and comment. We respect everyone voicing their views and opinions. しかし、, we cannot allow anyone to use the blog to further their own personal objective to the point that they usurp the authority of the blog.
これは、オープンハウスです. 必要はありませんノックして. だけで来る.
June 8th, 2010 の 9:51 午前
Thank you Ana, for having the courage to take a position, in action not just in words, and for communicating it so diplomatically.
July 8th, 2010 の 12:47 PM
Assalaam alaykum brothers & sisters,
I have just came through this wondeful blog recently and I found some very interesting titles here. I am a student mastering in political science, and Conflict Resolution and “alhamdu lillah” I am a “hafiz” (memorized the Quran al Kareem.”
I was wondering if anyone has an explanation of the verses that talk about poligamy in the Quran. “Marry women of your choice, 二つの, or three, or four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (彼らと), then only one.” Al-Quran (4:3)
In the same chapter Allah says in Surah Nisa verse 129, アッラーは言う:
“You will never be able to be fair and just among women (妻たち)….” コーラン (4:129)
だから, does this mean that actually it is not allowed to have multiple wives, because in Arabic, there are two forms of “rejecting” they use “LAM” と “LAN” in this second verse, Allah used “LAN” which is a restriction, or in another term “Impossibility”
Can anyone explain better?!
ありがとうございます, may allah bless you and provide with more knowledge.
July 8th, 2010 の 12:49 PM
Does the condition “You will never be able to be fair and just among women (妻たち) mean to tell us that we could but we should not engage into poligamy?!
July 10th, 2010 の 6:11 PM
Salaam Alaikum
BenSheriff, what a fantastic accomplishment, being a Hafiz is a great blessing, Marshallah!
There is no doubt that Allah,(SWT) has made marrying more than one woman permissable. しかし、, the conditions for doing so are really strict and they are very difficult to fulfill, especially in these times.
“Marry women of your choice, 二つの, or three, or four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly (彼らと), then only one.” (4:3)
‘JUSTLY’ in this context refers to equitable and social treatment. Equal treatment includes all social, economical and physical needs such as food, shelter, time allocation. しかし、, in the matter of love, even if a man tries to do equal justice, he will not be able to because it is not humanly possible. The Ayat; “You will never be able to be fair and just among women (妻たち)even if it is your ardent desire…"(4:129) is referring to a man’s feelings.
The term ‘LAN’ in Arabic can be interpretted as meaning ‘can’t or unable’ and in some contexts ‘impossible’. In the context of the Ayat, it means you will be ‘unable’ to do perfect justice between your wives when it comes to love.
This verse of the Quran recognizes the simple fact that when it comes to emotional treatment it is very difficult for human beings to be completely fair, even if you try. If a man’s heart is inclined towards one or has more love for one wife over the other, then that is beyond his control. But he should not let his extra-love for one wife be known to the other. That is what the second part of Ayat 4, surah 129 refers to; “…do not incline too much on one of them…” In other words be discreet!
It has been reported by Abu Dawud that Hazrat Aisha said “The Messenger of Allah used to treat his wives equally and proclaim, O Allah! This is my division in what I own, so do not blame me for what You own and I do not own” referring to his heart.
“No one can control his heart since it is entirely in the hands of Allah.”
My understanding of these Quranic verses and hadiths is that Allah is warning that even though HE permitted polygamy it does have its conditions which MUST be followed. If such conditions cannot be abided by and continually maintained, then do not engage in polygamy. As for feelings of love, that is not a condition.
I hope you find my explanation insightful.
Much salaam
July 11th, 2010 の 7:43 PM
As Salaamu Alaikum and peace to everyone!
I apologize for any delay in posting comments. I was away on vacation. It was most enjoyable and I’m happy to be back home with all of you. A few comments were approved while I was away. I’m happy to be back and hope all is good with everyone.
I received a comment today that was more appropriate for the contact form. The individual asked why I have to approve comments. Comments must be approved otherwise all types of spam would be on the blog. I receive numerous spam daily for viagra, porn etc.
There are some people that view the blog and its content as backbiting. We’ve been down this road before about whether the blog content is backbiting or not. I’ve noted and indicated repeatedly that people that don’t want to be identified blog annonymously. People globally blog here so no one knows who these people are unless they say go to Polygamy 411 and read my comment. The bloggers could be absolutely anyone in the whole wide WORLD. If anyone thinks the blog consist of slander and backbiting they have the option not to comment. I cannot allow the blog to be a forum for debate as to whether it’s backbiting or not. All are encouraged to share their stories, opinions, ideas, ask questions or whatever regarding polygamy.
As always, I thank all for commenting and I’m happy to have you here.
I’m just returning from vacation so I’ll be back in my routine of blogging with all my friends soooooon. Alex leave tomorrow so I’ll be back on my polygamous schedule
. それはすべて良いことだ 
これは、オープンハウスです. 必要はありませんノックして. だけで来る.
July 11th, 2010 の 8:33 PM
When I say people blog annonymously here at polygamy 411, it includes those that blog using fictitious names, aliases, AKA (also known as), screen names and the like. All of the aforementioned (fictitious names, aliases, screen names,
等) are permitted and welcomed here.
これは、オープンハウスです. 必要はありませんノックして. だけで来る.
July 12th, 2010 の 8:05 PM
As Salaamu Alaikum BenSherif! Thank you very much for joining us here at polygamy 411. How blessed you are to be a Hafiz. Our sister Zainab will be one soon, 同様に, if she’s not already. It is a major, huge accomplishment in deed. It’s very special for both of you.
Huda, thank you much for giving your understanding of the Quranic verses BenSherif referenced. You explained them so clearly and in such a simple way for all to understand. It’s truly refreshing the way you expounded on those verses. So often we come across so many people that twist the Iyats all around to suite their purpose – wanting to prohibit polygamy. How often does Allah say He has made the Quran easy to understand and remember? はまだ, many people want to complicate it. I guess it’s all part of rejecting faith. I hope I didn’t set myself up for an attack on that one
笑
これは、オープンハウスです. 必要はありませんノックして. だけで来る.
July 15th, 2010 の 10:01 午前
Salaam Alaikum
I have a question; if a man enters polygamy and has the intention to treat his wives equally and justly in all matters, what happens if he fails to do this?
I know a wife can seek divorce if the husband does not give her equal rights, but what about the husband?
What happens if several months into the new marriage he finds he is unable to support or provide for both financially (for example could have lost his job) or he finds it difficult to split his time equally due to children matters, distance, work etc? What happens if he dislikes the 2nd wife, or loses interest in the 1st? Does he continue with the polygamous marriage regardless,(even though he is unable to fulfil the conditions) or should he seek divorce from one of them?
I ask this question because many men enter polygamy not fully comprehending the enormous task and rigorous conditions they must adhere to. Initially it may seem easy and they have full intention to follow the ‘ルール’ しかし、, once committed, it can prove (for some) an ardent task, so what do they do? Obviously if they are unable to be ‘ただ公正と’ are they not then sinning? If the husband recognises this, shouldn’t he find a way to prevent himself from sinning, even if it means divorce?
I understand that Allah would want all parties to be patient and put trust in HIM in such circumstances, しかし、, if one knows he is being ‘unfair’ and neglecting his duties at the expense of one wife what then?
For example if a man has 2 妻たち, each in their own home, would he give up one home and expect them to live together in the other because he could no longer afford two homes? What if they disliked each other and did not agree? Can he demand it? Isn’t each wife permitted to have her OWN space/home/lodging?
I would be very interested to know what the Islamic stance is in such circumstances and if anyone has come across such a situation.
Much salaam
July 15th, 2010 の 12:39 PM
サラームとしてWAアライクム, Huda
You asked some very, very good questions. In general, I’d say if a husband enters a polygamous marriage with good intentions, but finds he is unable to fulfill his obligations, there are a number of options:
The parties could sit down and mutually consult about the problem and find a solution that is acceptable to all involved.
The parties could bring in an intermediary from both families (the husband and the wife’s) to help resolve the problems. (In my case, I brought in my wali/guardian, as I have no Muslim family members.)
The party that is discontent with matters could seek divorce.
The parties could seek counsel from Islamic scholars, jurist, イマーム, などを.
I can use my situation for example. 最近, I decided I wanted Alex to pay for all my needs in our household and I demanded he do so. It’s my right to have him pay for everything although at one time I said he didn’t have to. Alex was angered by my demand and decided to discuss the matter with my Wali (guardian). It was determined it would be a hardship for him to pay for everything that I demanded and be able to continue to maintain Carolinah and me. My wali contacted me and we discussed the matter. I decided not to hold Alex to my demands, as it was more of a want than a need in my case and I must admit – revenge.
As you said Huda, many men enter polygamy with good intentions, but once in it find they have insurmountable problems, and got something they didn’t bargain for. In my case, Alex promised Carolinah that he would never divorce her, and would always give her money. From what I gather, he intends to keep the promise. Maybe it’s a blessing, maybe it’s a curse, ONLY ALLAH KNOWS. The way he engaged in polygamy, for the reasons he engaged in it and with whom he engaged in it leads me to believe that it’s more of a curse for Alex than a blessing; アッラーが最もよく知って.
I think what happens with regard to a husband being unable to fulfill his obligations is a matter that will be decided by Allah. It’ll be between the man and Allah. I can only say that the man who engages in polygamy and is unable to fulfill his obligation to be just and fair (whatever that is) has put himself in a position I wouldn’t want to find myself in when I have to go before my Lord.
These are just some of my thoughts regarding your questions. I hope more persons would come forward with their input, 同様に
@Marcel,
Salaam Marcel! I’m happy your mum is well and good
Perhaps you and your sibblings moving in with your dad will give you some quality time together and allow you to bond in a healthy way, インシャーアッラー.
これは、オープンハウスです. 必要はありませんノックして. だけで来る.
July 15th, 2010 の 1:03 PM
Giving it further thought, I don’t necessarily think it is the duty of the man to divorce one of his wives if he can’t fulfill his obligation. I think it falls upon the wives as well to determine what they are willing to live with and not. If the husband stays in the marriages knowing he’s falling short of meeting his obligations then, 再び, he will have to account to his Lord for what he has done. I think a man could ask his wives all to live together or demand it. It’s up to the wives as to whether they oblige their husbands’ request or demand. We have to be mindful that there is no compulsion in Islam.
これは、オープンハウスです. 必要はありませんノックして. だけで来る.
July 15th, 2010 の 5:25 PM
Salaam Ana
I understand all you have said, but it sounds to me that if the man finds himself in this scenario, it is always the women who have to sacrifice and try and make it work. I know of an incident where the Imam was brought in to mediate within a polygamous marriage. The 2nd wasn’t getting her equal time because he was busy with his 1st wife and children (the 2nd had none) which took a lot of his time. しかし、, it seemed like she had to compromise and try and accommodate her husband’s shortfalls.
場合, like you said Ana, a man requests/demands his wives to live together and they then refuse, he will then put them in a situation where they have to choose whether to stay in the marriage (with the new conditions he has just put in place) or leave. Either way, it isn’t easy and instead of the man taking responsibility, he manages to escape and the responsibility falls upon the woman to make the decision. Wouldn’t it then seem to others that the wife (whatever position) was being uncooperative and too demanding of her husband? I can just see it now a husband sighing “OH, she wasn’t satisfied with what I could give her so she asked for a divorce” when in fact it was he who could not deliver what was required/intended and is given reprieve! Don’t you agree?
Maybe I am just ranting but it’s something that crossed my mind when I tried to explain the Ayats that Bensherif commented on previously. I just thought, while reading Surat Al-Nisa ‘what if the man could not be JUST after he married?’
Much salaam
July 15th, 2010 の 7:21 PM
サラームとしてWAアライクム, Huda!
私はあなたと同意. The weight is placed on the women when the men fall short. The women are usually placed in the position of having to like it or leave it. I think Alex would be content with either Carolinah or me leaving the marriage to make life easier for him. Neither she nor I, もちろん, wishes to leave because of the advantages in staying.
It’s difficult as well for Alex to leave as he knows it would leave Carolinah in a financial bind and he promised her that he’d never leave. I think it was foolish of him to promise and for her to ask. I wouldn’t want to tie someone to me regardless of whether they wanted to be with me or not. It’s seems like the person is hard up and desperate to me, if she ask for such a promise. 彼, 順に, deserves all the hardship, frustration and pain that he endures for making such a promise.
In your situation, it would be difficult for your husband to leave the other when he has now bonded with her, and has a child with her. I don’t see you as being the type of person that would ask him to leave her in that condition. It says a lot that is good about us for not asking them to leave the others. If they leave the others, it would be of their own doing, free from encouragement from us. I think they would only resent us in the long run, if we were to ask them to leave.
When it comes to being “just and fair,” I’m not really sure what that means and there are people with varying interpretations. My Egyptian male friend said a man has to spend a dollar for a dollar on the women, equally. My wali/friend said the opposite. He said the man shouldn’t leave one women living in luxury and the other in poverty, but he should keep them each according to the life style they were accustom to when he met them. もちろんの, the man becoming a part of their lives would naturally improve their condition regardless of whether they were rich or poor. He said a man could see any of his wives any time he chooses and the only thing he must do is lay his head on the pillow at night regardless of what time he gets there and for how long. I know in the Quran Allah states a man should not leave a woman hanging in a way that she feels she doesn’t even have a husband. It leads me to believe the rigid way of living, dollar for dollar, minute for minute is a burden a man places on himself, as Allah would not give a man a burden more than he has the strength to bear.
I thank Allah much that I’m not a man, living polygamy that has the burden of having to be “just and fair.” At least in a monogamous marriage being “just and fair” isn’t a concern.
You’re not ranting at all, Huda; it’s good dialogue.
これは、オープンハウスです. 必要はありませんノックして. だけで来る.
July 17th, 2010 の 7:09 午前
I thought you might be interested in the preliminary results of this study :
July 17th, 2010 の 11:35 午前
Chatelaine, thank you very much for bringing the article to the attention of Polygamy 411. I published it as a new post for all to read.
これは、オープンハウスです. 必要はありませんノックして. だけで来る.