So, everything seemed as usual in our home; I was content; I guess you could even say I was happy. But, I did notice Alex was still in his mind, somewhat distant. And then, spontaneously, out of nowhere, he said to me, “I’m going to marry Carolina.”
Wow, I didn’t see that one coming…. I just remember saying, “Well, I’m going to get a divorce.” He said he didn’t want a divorce. I said I didn’t care. He said I couldn’t divorce him in Islam, as I had no reason to.
I frantically threw on some street clothes and a coat, grabbed my cell phone, and ran out into the street. (I live in a quiet cul-de-sac. It was a Sunday evening, nighttime, and conversations outside could be heard clearly by anyone inside.) I called my best friend (of 20 plus years, who introduced me to Islam, my wali). I was absolutely hysterical, screaming loudly, and crying uncontrollably… I felt like I was in the middle of nowhere, looking up at the sky, at the stars and the houses all around. Nothing seemed real accept the voice on the other end of the phone.
I told him what Alex had said. My friend’s response was, “ It’s OK; he’s allowed to do that.” I screamed, “I can’t do it. I can’t. I can’t.” I said, “ I want a divorce.” He said I had no reason to divorce him. He said I couldn’t divorce him just because I didn’t like Allah’s decision. He said I had to try to accept Allah’s decision and if I couldn’t, he would help me get a divorce. He told me to stop crying. He said, “Go back inside, and don’t let him see you crying.”