The “Kumalık Kulübü” Malezya olarak
tarafından Ann Ekim tarihinde.08, 2009, sırasında Medyada çok eşlilik
“Polygamist Muhammed Inaamulillah Bin Ashaari dört eşleri AP Photo ile gösterilir.”
Hayır Koca? No Problem! Malezya Kumalık Club Zaten Evli Erkekler ile Maçlar Hatch için.
O avukatlık zaman, Kartini Maarof kez boşandıktan müşteri için görev çağrısı çok ötesine geçti.
Rohaya Mohamad için düzenlenmiş, Yedi çocuk annesi, tekrar evlenmek üzere _ Kartini kendi kocasına.
Bir on yıl için paylaşılan eşi 43 yaşındaki Ikramullah Ashaari, dört eşleri ve 17 çocuklar. Onun 72 yaşındaki baba 38 beş evlilikler yavrulara, hiç bir defada dört eşlerinden İslam'ın öngörülen sınırı flouted kalmadan.
Kumalık Malezya de Müslümanlar için yasal, ama yaygın değil. Ashaari klan olması gerektiğine inanıyor. Geçen ay bir başlattı “Kumalık Kulübü” tek annelere yardımcı soylu amacı iddia, hissediyorum reform fahişeler ve kadın evlenmek yaşını geçmiş.
“Biz insanlar çok eşliliğin algılama biçimini değiştirmek istediğiniz, iğrenç bir şey yerine güzel bir şey olarak görülecektir ki,” Hatijah Aam dedi, kulübün kurucusu. O Ikramullah babasının dördüncü eşi olan, Ashaari Muhammed.
Kumalık bir Asya demokrasi, gökdelenler gurur görünebilir, yüksek teknoloji becerileri ve girişken ekonomisi. Ama bu Müslüman çoğunluğa sahip bir ülkede sağlam bir yer tutar 27 dindarlık derinden gömülü ve Müslümanlar milyon, alkol ya da karşı cinsten bir çift evli olmadığı sürece consorting tutuklandı..
Hükümet ayrıca dini pratik politikalar. Ashaari, aile patrik, yasaklı bir İslami mezhep başkanı 1994 günahkarların absolver Ashaari öngörülen gibi sapkın çünkü.
Çok eşlilik Club üyelerinin çoğu mezhebine ait, ve yaşadıkları hakkında yasadışı bir şey var, onlar Müslüman konum olarak çok uzun zaman. Müslüman olmayan nüfusun üçte biri için, çokeşlilik yasadışı.
Uygulamanın daha yaygın olarak kullanılan ancak tahmini olarak küçüldüğünü 2 tüm Müslüman kadınlar gibi evliliklerin yüzde özgür hale gelmiştir ve kariyer onlar için açtı.
Polygamists Hazreti Muhammed'in hayatı boyunca yaklaşık bir düzine kadın, evli olduğu düşünülmektedir olduğunu işaret, korunmaya muhtaç dul dahil olmak üzere.
“Bazı insanlar onlar tam olarak idrak edemez, çünkü bir gülme malzemesi olarak çok eşliliğin tedavi,” Ikramullah diyor, babasının ilk eşi neşeli bir işadamı ve oğlu. “Ancak bu uygulamalar bir topluluk tuhaf olduğunu bilemez. Aslında, yalnızca bir karısı olan bir adam olsaydı alay olacaktır.”
Kulüp sayısı iddia 300 koca ve 700 eşleri. Bu mutlu hanelerin örnekler, bazı eşler söylüyorlar ve çocuklar, çok eşli evlilikler acı kadın hakları aktivistleri karşı yetiştirmek için umut. Club üyeleri, çokeşlilik zina engeller ve daha fazla erkek evlenmek için mevcut olsaydı, eski fahişe evlilik umutlarını artıracak.
Ama Shahrizat Abdul Jalil, aile politikası görevli Müslüman kadın bakan, çokeşlilik diyor “bizim toplumda teşvik edildiği bir kültür değildir.”
Sisters İslam'da, çokeşlilik karşı bir savunma grubu kampanya, kadınlar için iyi değil diyor.
“Eğer insanlar tek eşli olmayı tercih, her kadın için yeterli erkek vardır,” Associated Press'e yaptığı açıklamada dedi.
Çok eşlilik biri rakip, sadece Sharifah olarak tanımlanabilir istedi 42 yaşındaki bir iş yürütme. O neredeyse, kocası boşanma tehdidinde söyledi 15 o boşanmış bir anne ile üç aşık olduğunu, geçen yıl ona yıllar sonra, o yardıma ihtiyacı hissetti, ve onunla evlenmek istedi.
“Benim peri masalı sona ermiş gibi hissettim,” Sharifah söyledi. “O benim ruh ikizi oldu. … Ben oluyordu inanamadım. Sonra ben ona çığlık atmaya başladı.”
O bazı insanlar ikinci eşi kabul cennette onun yerine güvenli olacağını söyledim dedi. Ama Sharifah, iki çocuğu ve işsiz kocası için velayete, vermeyi reddetti. Çift, evlilik danışmanlığı uygulandı ve Sharifah kocası başka bir kadınla evlenmek için söz verdi.
“Kadınlar bir stand yapmak zorunda. Biz daha ARTAN. Biz haklarımızı biliyoruz,” dedi. “Ben bir çok eşli evlilik girmek olmaz. Ben daha iyisini hak ediyor biliyorum.”
Kartini, 41, çok eşliliğin de ona hizmet etmiştir diyor; o davaların savunarak meşgul iken, kocasının ilk eşi pişirin., temiz ve çocuklara bakmak.
“Eşleri birbirlerini tamamlarlar.,” dedi. “Tabii ki, Eğer kocanız özledim ve doğal ilk bakışta rekabet ve kıskançlık duyguları vardır. Ancak bir süre sonra, arkadaş olmaya çalışın ve size birbirleri ile sorunları paylaşmak olduğunu öğrenmek.”
Kadınların tek bir çatı altında yaşamayı kabul etmediğiniz sürece kulüp kocalarının çoğu kendi evinde her eşin devam diyor. Birçok kocaları haneler arasında gün döndürmek.
Sıkı sıkıya bağlı ailenin Rawang yoğunlaşmıştır, Kuala Lumpur dışında bir kasaba, Malezya en büyük şehri. Onlar, dini bayramlar ve diğer festivaller için bir araya, bir son gibi “Aile Günü” birbirleri için şarkı seslendirdi ve piknik. Onlar kamu kolayca karışıyor, sıradan bir aile gibi sohbet ve şaka.
Kulüp ailenin bakkalları tarafından finanse edilmektedir, restoranlar ve diğer işletmeler. Bu çöpçatanlık sunmayı planlıyor, düğün planlama ve evlilik danışmanlığı.
Hatijah, kimlerin patrik dördüncü eşi oldu 1982, çok eşlilik, şüpheci olması için kullanılır, diye endişeli çünkü evlilik kabul etti ki az 27, o çok eski bir koca bulmaya başlamıştı.
Şimdi 54 ve sekiz çocuk annesi, diyor: “Bir koca paylaşımı ile ne yanlış? Neredeyse bunu oldum 30 yıl.”
Kredi bilgi için yukarıda: Associated Press-RAWANG, Malezya, Yedi 27, 2009
Bir Yanıt bırak
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Salaamu Alaikum gibi!
Hoş geldiniz Polygamy 411! Bizim ev Müslümanlar ve Müslüman olmayanlar için. Çok eşlilik hakkında konuşmak isteyen herkes için, ya da çok eşli bir evlilik ya da herkes bir girmeyi düşünen. Biz şirket olmak gibi. Rahatına ve yorum bırakarak tartışmaya katılmaya. Biz bir süre sonra tekrar ve sık sık burada görmeyi bekliyoruz.
seyahat 4 daha az!
October 8th, 2009 üzerinde 6:58 PM
“Benim peri masalı sona ermiş gibi hissettim,” Sharifah söyledi…” ” Ben oluyordu inanamadım. Sonra ben ona çığlık atmaya başladı.”
It almost sounds like a page from my story. The difference is Sharifah’s fairlytale almost crumbled. Her husband didn’t marry the woman after Sharifah objected.
October 10th, 2009 üzerinde 7:47 PM
Ana,
Just curious…(can we keep religion out of the answer?)
In hindsight, would you have preferred to have Alex as a busted married man in an affair, or to have it this way?
Sorry if this is too personal a question.
I personally feel the marriage thing makes it more humiliating.
October 10th, 2009 üzerinde 8:44 PM
JeanneT,
Your question isn’t too personal at all. Your question, as I understand it, is would I rather have Alex as my husband that cheated and got caught (and continued cheating with me knowing about it) or have a husband that took another “karı” without my permission. Benim için, I don’t think it would make a difference. It all would probably feel like “cheating” to me. Ağrı, devastation, and humiliation for me would probably be the same. It doesn’t matter how he does it, just that he did. I think what’s significant is the effect that it has on the wife…the psychological effect, mental anguish, and physical distress that it causes.
To me it is humiliating either way. It’s humiliating for me as the masses don’t understand polygamy and don’t accept it, nor do many Muslims accept it. For me it’s humiliating because my husband is lying around, climbing in and out of bed with another woman who has no respect for herself or me. That makes it even worst.
I hope I answered your question, JeanneT. Değilse, let me know.
Bu açık bir evdir. Gerek vurmak. Sadece gel.
October 12th, 2009 üzerinde 12:49 PM
So Sharifah is the sole support of her jobless husband and two children and her husband still tried to convince her to let him marry someone else? Forget her fairy tale, what exact fairy tale was he envisioning, that his wife would also support him in his love nest with a new wife? Yet another example of a man insisting on his “haklar” to marry multiple wives but completing ignoring the concurrent religious obligations to those wives.
October 12th, 2009 üzerinde 2:29 PM
In the secular world, there are these ‘cake men’. They want their cake and to eat it too. They want the community respect of stable home life, meals, laundry services, child care, vb, and they want a little bit of strange on the side. Regularly.
And the lovely mistress doesn’t have to deal with smelly socks or dirty diapers. Never tired, always ready. No wonder the sex is so good! But it is a rarity for these guys to actually support the other woman financially. And she gets dropped like a hot rock as soon as he gets busted. Until the dust settles, then they are back in business as usual.
Devastating to be the other woman (being told all manner of lies to keep it going) and devastating to be the spouse.
Lies, lies, lies.
As painful as polygamy can be, at least it is more honest. And open.
There is this book out there called The Monogamy Myth (which I have not read). Is monogamy too much to expect? Is it so unrealistic that women set themselves up for pain by such a high expectation?
These is so much sadness out in the world of marriage. I am so disillusioned.
And Ali: For the record, I am NOT looking for another marriage.
October 12th, 2009 üzerinde 5:50 PM
Monogamy appears to be the myth evidenced by the statistics of men that take second, third and fourth wives, “dolandırıcı”, sleep around, have affairs, and set up mistresses.
I wonder if the men that take second, third and forth wives have the same disposition of men that aren’t polygamous, but simply sleep around with multiple women. They like variety.
Perhaps monogamy forces a man into a position that is not natural since his nature is to desire many women. But then on the other hand, Muhammed (Sas) was monogamous for 25 yıl.
It’s just all so crazy. We do know that peace and tranquility in a marriage is possible. Maybe men and women are just so far, far away from the mark. I need some real serious work on my imam for sure.
October 12th, 2009 üzerinde 7:23 PM
I agree. I think polygamy is more open and honest. The wife knows the husband has another wife/wives and knows who she/they are. If a man is inclined towards many women, he commits to no more than four opposed to just jumping in and out of bed with any woman that come alongs that suits his fancy.
Talking about having their cake and eat it too. Husbands like Sharifah’s that ignore religious obligations are the one’s that get the best of this world and this world only. They apparently don’t care much about the Hereafter.
October 12th, 2009 üzerinde 10:05 PM
Monogamy may be uncomfortable for some, but isn’t it going to be a lot more pleasant, in the end, than dealing with the hurt, gösterir, financial stress and social woes that come from the alternatives? And that is just the trouble in this world.
My advice to any married man:
Tell the truth.
Do the math.
Move on with a clean slate and a clear conscience if you just can’t be happy with the one you’re with.
October 13th, 2009 üzerinde 11:49 AM
Sharifa, in this case, might be lucky to be the only one with the job. Probably gave her a lot more control of the situation than if the economics were reversed.
October 13th, 2009 üzerinde 11:59 AM
It is not necessary to marry someone (like a helpless widow) in order to be charitable to her and her children. The motivation can only be about wanting to have sex with her. Seems to be a great motivator to get people to complicate their lives. *sigh*
October 13th, 2009 üzerinde 2:50 PM
This is just a general response, not to anyone in particular.
People should not be swayed by ignorance. Allah says those striving to be Believers should marry for piety and righteousness, marry those among you who are chaste. He did not say marry for sex. Sex is meant for procreation. Maybe Allah made sex desirable so people will procreate.
Allah says those who are moved with desire have a “diseased heart.” Allah says Fast, if you have a desire for sex. He did not say get married to satisfy that desire. I am not saying it’s unlawful to have sex for the enjoyable experience with your spouse. To have sex for the enjoyable experience is to satisfy your own sexual desires, if it’s not for procreation.
If one says he or she has sex for Allah, then he or she should be trying to procreate to raise a God fearing child. How does someone have sex, seeking the pleasure of Allah, if his or her intention is not to procreate? How does that work? Explain that to me.
We should not make something lawful that Allah has made unlawful, nor should we make something unlawful that Allah has made lawful. This applies to a great number of things across the board, just to mention a couple: secret wives, as well as Muslim vegetarian who says red meat is not healthy. Allah says eat of all the good things and exclusively meat that Allah’s name has been pronounce over at the time of slaughter. Picking and choosing what you like from the Quran falls into this category, as well. Tearing tden into shreds, as you pick and choose what you like from the Quran falls into this category, as well.
Asla, everything in the Quran is compulsory for Believers, but not compulsory for the non-believers.
October 13th, 2009 üzerinde 7:34 PM
Ali
As salaamu alaykum wa Rahmat Allah wa Barakatuh.
I did not say that red meat was not healthy. Ancak, food is no longer in the same healthy, wholesome state it was at the time of the Prophet, salla Allahu alayhi wa sallam. If the red meat is pumped full of hormones, steroids, antibiotics, and pesticides is it not healthy…and Allah tells us not to destroy ourselves in the Quran. Bu yüzden, just as I said, my children eat red meat, when it is both halal AND tayyibaat. Just as the Prophet, salla Allahu alayhi wa salaam, preferred not to eat lizard and had preferences when it came to food, so may we other human beings. Abu Bakr ate the lizard, but the Prophet did not…and there was nothing wrong with it other than it wasn’t the food he was used to and he didn’t want to eat it. I am not a kaafir because I do not like red meat or because I believe that foods that are chemical laden, noxious, and toxic are unhealthy…and Allah truly Knows.
Evet, we must take everything from the Quran. Ancak, doing everything in the Quran is obviously not compulsory. Just because we know that animals are slaughtered for the aqiqahs of our children, doesn’t mean I have to go out and slit the throat. My husband can do that and I am not sinning to avoid it. If everything was compulsory, then when I went for Hajj they would have made me kill the hadi, but they simply took my money and did it for me. I’m 5’1″ and 115lbs Ali, I cannot even restrain the animal. Just because polygamy is in the Quran, doesn’t make it compulsory for every Muslim. What IS compulsory it to believe and accept that everything in the Quran is the best of ways and the best of guidance for mankind.
I have no issues about a single thing in the Quran. However, the last country to abolish slavery was Mauritania in the 80′ile. The Prophet,salla Allahu alayhi wa sallam, freed a slave and encouraged freeing slaves. Does that mean he rejected what is in the Quran about slaves? Içinde. It exists, and most surely it has a place in certain situations or it would not be in the Quran. However, just as it is, or was, a protection for some to be taken as slaves, that does not mean we all have to rush out and get a slave. Aslında, one cannot just go out and take a slave. The permission to take a slave is when in a lawful jihad (not just when some fool calls jihad), with all the conditions.
As for procreation, if all we are allowed to have sex for, and say it is for the sake of Allah is to procreate, then are the infertile man and woman to be celibate forever? Should men divorce their wives once they reach menopause because they cannot have children anymore? If procreation was the whole point, the wives of the Prophet, salla Allahu alayhi wa sallam, did not have babies except for Khadijah and Mary the Coptic. Some of the wives he took were already past child-bearing age. He clearly had relations with them all.
There are clear ahadith that if a man sees a woman that he desires he should go home and approach his wife – his halal means of enjoyment. Husbands and wives are garments unto each other. It is a sadaqah to make love to one’s wife. Buna ek olarak, there are ahadith about ‘azl being permissible, indicating that sex did not have to be for procreation. Bu yüzden, although I understand that procreation is a reason for sex, fulfilling one’s desires in the lawful way Allah has provided, is also a form of worship. If you satisfy this urge unlawfully, you get punished, and if you satisfy it lawfully, you get rewarded.
Perhaps we are having a slight communication error due to the use of language. May Allah unite our hearts and minds upon tawheed and clear the communication lines – ameen.
October 14th, 2009 üzerinde 8:51 AM
Asla,
As salaamu alaykum,m
Satan has entered our Religion through a door that many Muslims hold sacred. Allah revealed the Qur’an and it is replete with everything we need as well as protected by Allah Himself. The Qur’an is our Constitution as well as our Criteria to judge with. Nothing else created can constitute the same!
Regarding red meat, Allah has commanded us to eat only the meat that His Name is pronounced over at the time of slaughtering. Allah is not capable of purifying this animal at the time of slaughter?
Regarding sex without the intent to procreate – is a tool that Allah has given Satan as a weapon, in his effort to fulfill his promise to Allah. And from what I can see Satan is doing a good job. He is constantly on his job!
A sexual act is motivated by one’s desire. Desire is the number one factor that prevents us from drawing nearer to our Lord. Remember Ibilis? His desire was not to bow down to Adam SWT! It all started from there!
October 15th, 2009 üzerinde 1:38 AM
Ali,
Salaamu Alaikum gibi! Çok eşlilik için hoşgeldiniz 411. Your wisdom and understanding is valued here.
I encourage you to keep your focus on polygamy and please try not to digress from the topic too much.
We’re all like a family here. We all come from diverse backgrounds with varying thoughts, duygular, and understanding about Polygamy. Please be kind and gentle. We try not to play hardball here.
Bu açık bir evdir. Gerek vurmak. Sadece gel.
14 Aralık, 2009 üzerinde 4:33 AM
Salaam için bütün,
This stream of commentary is full of inacurracies and terrible logic, all of which stem from ignorance. Ignorance has no master but Iblis, and his master is pride. Humiliation and hurt are childish emotional reactions to reality, hence the “fairy tale” logic which condemns itself as it is bathed in narcissism.
I cannot attend to all the errors I’ve just read, but let me state that men are by “nature” çok eşli, and sex is not just for “procreation” nor is its many pleasures simply a tool for Satan’s use. Men are indeed from Mars and women from Venus. We do not think or even “hissetmek” in the same manner and the differences are complementary rather than oppositional. When they become oppositional, it is due to a lack of knowledge and this is due to a lack of both education and the willingness to learn.
Şimdi, rather than give a course on the sexual, duygusal, physiological and even mental differences between men and women, I suggest you all do your own research. There is an abundance of books on the topic, and the best way to understand your spouse is to first understand yourself and just how it is Al Mussawir put you together.
When you start the new website Ana, I’ll be happy to post my guidelines for men and women if you have a ‘small book’ section available. Understanding the basic needs of men and those of women is a valuable tool in one’s larder of wisdom. The larders I’ve just read are fairly empty, and hence the empty headed ‘duygusal’ oommentaries that are of little good other than to make one “hissetmek’ good momentarily, which is another extrememly self-centered desire rather than need.
Ah … the Polygamy Club in Malaysia, ., in fact, a cult with political ambitions and not necessarily in line with the Shari’ah. But they mean well and so did the Crusaders.
Veda,
dr omar
7 Temmuz, 2011 üzerinde 2:27 PM
Eğer 1 wife is not enough…he’ll never ever be satisfied.
In my opinion, this behaviour is absolutely abnormal.
Only God can satisfy Him and this is not how God created man for.
God bless u.
7 Temmuz, 2011 üzerinde 9:20 PM
Hello Amy,
Çok eşlilik için hoşgeldiniz 411. Thank you for joining us and commenting.
Siz belirtti, “Eğer 1 wife is not enough…he’ll never ever be satisfied.” And you know this, how?
In Islam and with other religions, de, polygamy is very normal. It was created by God too. I assume you’re not Muslim or Mormon. It’s no problem that you are not for us here at polygamy 411.
Thank you for sharing your opinion
Bu açık bir evdir. Gerek vurmak. Sadece gel.
8 Temmuz, 2011 üzerinde 2:35 PM