Do Piety and Polygamy Go Together

do piety and polygamy go togetherDo piety and polygamy go together? I can say with certainty that a woman who is in a polygamous marriage is not necessarily more pious than a woman who is not. The type of marriage, whether a monogamous one or none at all doesn’t make one pious in and of itself. There is nothing in the Holy Quran that says a woman in a polygamous marriage is better than one who isn’t.

I have spoken of how being in a polygamous marriage may help a woman on her journey to Paradise. For one thing, I say this because a woman in a polygamous marriage may have to conquer base, lowly emotions. For instance, she may have to learn how to deal with jealousy, envy, rancor, selfishness, or hatred. Such negative feelings are bound to rear their ugly heads. The wives may need to learn to subdue those emotions, if they want to survive in a polygamous marriage. Wives will need to face those feelings head on, if they want to have a successful union.

Do piety and polygamy go together? What’s their relationship to each other?

Women who are in polygamous marriages have a lot to learn. For one thing, they must learn to share. Of course the husbands will be with their other wives at times. Therefore, wives must learn to take charge of themselves and their children when their husbands aren’t there with them.

It’s not solely the women who are in polygamous marriages who have to step up when their husbands aren’t with them. Some single women without husbands have to do it, as well. Some women in monogamous marriages may have to rise to the occasion when their husbands are away, just the same. Perhaps the husbands will be on business trips or in the military and deployed etc. Needless to say, women have a lot in common in respect of having to fend for themselves sometimes.

Not only wives, but we all need to learn to put Allah first. Wives need to learn not to make their husbands their priority in life. It takes turning to Allah for help in making Him number one in their lives.

I speak about women in polygamous marriages and how they need to deal with certain matters. In particular, I stress how they need to get their souls purified. No one can enter Paradise with an impure heart. The base emotions that I mentioned above could prevent a woman from growing nearer to Allah. For one thing, wives competing with each other for their husband’s love and affection could interfere in their progress. It could get in the way of them drawing closer to Allah in His attributes.

In answer to: Do piety and polygamy go together? The answer is: Not necessarily

Allah says the most honorable person is the one who is the most righteous. The most righteous person could be divorced, widowed, in a polygamous marriage, or in a monogamous one. Allah knows best who is the most righteous of us all.

Being in a polygamous marriage shouldn’t make a woman think that she is more pious than anyone else. It’s no guarantee. There is nothing to support the thought. I don’t want anyone to think that I think it, because I don’t.

I want to help women in polygamous marriages get to the point where they can put Allah first in their lives. They should obey Allah and worship Him the way that He instructs us to. When we do it, we can reap the rewards that Allah has promised to us in this world and in the Hereafter.

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4 Comments

  • anabellah

    August 17, 2016

    Marah S,

    Thank you! Your comment/post inspired me to write this post theme. What you said was very important. It needed a post/thread by itself, for those surfing the net. We need to remind one another because this is the type of stuff that we overlook or tend to forget :-)

  • Marah S

    August 17, 2016

    I love this post, and how honest you are. It’s so important to get this message across. A lot of people have this misconception.

  • Karima

    August 17, 2016

    Salam sis Ana

    great post thank you for being here for us! May Allah bless you and all the sisters here?

  • anabellah

    August 16, 2016

    Oooops, I had to make a correction. In the forth paragraph I had the word “polygamous” where it should have been “monogamous”. Sorry about that.