Have a Pain-Free Polygamous Marriage

Have a pain-free polygamous marriageTo have a pain-free polygamous marriage a wife must do what Allah says. We all should do what Allah says. He says that when a thought from Satan comes to mind, we are to seek refuge in Him. Generally, we must remember Him. If the wife keeps thoughts in her head about her husband, his other wife or about he and his other wife or she thinks badly of herself, it’s not good.

It’s terrible to let her thoughts play out in her mind. When they do, she is not remembering Allah. Anytime something is on a person’s mind and it’s not Allah, she’s not remembering Allah.

For the most part, we can remember Allah and do our normal, everyday, regular activities. For instance, remember that Allah created the sun, the moon, the night and the day etc.  Thank Allah for the rain, for giving us our sight, hearing, understanding, and for protecting us etc.

Additionally, remember Allah’s attributes or repeat his names. Reading the Quran is important to know what Allah expects of us. Simply think of Him. Furthermore, don’t neglect offering Salat (five daily prayers). Do whatever reminds us of Allah. Specifically, everything should remind us of Him

To have a pain-free polygamous marriage, a wife needs a pure soul

Allah purifies and purifies whom He wills. The only way a wife will win the battle and overcome her suffering is if Allah purifies her soul. He could purify it of the envy, jealously, hatred, selfishness, and all the other base emotions, but she has to worship Him for Him to do it.

To have a pain-free polygamous marriage, it’s not good enough for one to simply say she is Muslim. Nor is it good enough for a wife to ask Allah to remove the pain and suffering that she feels and she does nothing in return. It takes much more. Allah says have patience, persevere, pray, remember Him, and offer the five daily prayers (not 0,1,2,3, or 4, but all five of them). Those are just some of what He tells us to do.

So, how could a wife have a pain-free polygamous marriage?

Well, there is no quick fix. She must ask Allah to heal her. A wife must ask Him to relieve her of the suffering. Only He can relieve the pain.

Allah causes us to suffer so we could learn humility. It’s important to humble ourselves to Allah. A wife shouldn’t humble herself to her husbands or anyone other than Allah. Allah says He removes our pain. He purifies and He heals us.

In conclusion, remember that Allah’s promises are true… What He says will come to pass.

Read part one: Live in a Polygamous Marriage Pain-Free

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  • ummof4

    January 26, 2017

    As-salaamu Alaikum and hello to all,

    Xallma, again, welcome to the blog.  May it be a source of information for you as you strive to gain a better understanding of polygyny.

  • anabellah

    January 25, 2017

    Xallma, AsSalaamu Alaikum,

    Welcome! Thank you much for commenting and for your kind words. Feel free to follow browse etc

    Insha Allah, if Allah places you in a polygamous marriage, you’ll have real life experiences of the ladies here to help see you through it.

  • Xallma

    January 25, 2017

    Can I just say, as a sister to other sisters, you’re so beautiful – each and every one of you. The issues discussed are such real and raw insight into a world that is so unknown to many of us Muslim women across the world. 

    May Allah swt make this space you sisters share a source of blessing and reward in the Akirah. 

    I’m just wandering and broadening my understanding, so I hope you don’t mind me just scrolling along and cheering on the strength of My sisters. I always though us female kind were the stronger force, now I’ve read it for myself. https://www.polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_yahoo.gif

  • anabellah

    December 29, 2016

    Hi Nicole, :-)

    I’m hopeful we can help you out, but we’ll need to know what your situation is. Tell us as much about you as you feel comfortable sharing. We’ll try to help as best we can

  • Nicole

    December 29, 2016

    https://www.polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_yahoo.gif I’m in need of a support group in my area I’m dying in side don’t want to do what I used to do because I love him so. Please help

  • Karima

    December 22, 2016

    Salam my humble opinion is that only women with pure heart and strong deen can handle polygamy well to the point they don’t feel the pain due to Allahs mercy mashallah

  • anabellah

    December 7, 2016

    In case some of you were wondering what Alison was talking about, this new post/theme that Sis Alison replied to is a reminder. It’s just showing up now on the front page. https://www.polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_mail.gif

  • anabellah

    December 7, 2016

    Hi there, Alison :-)

    It’s not an easy thing to do. It’s doable though. You must continue to want it and persevere with patience.

    Allah says seek His help with patience, perseverance and prayer. It is indeed difficult except for those who bring a lowly spirit, who are humbly submissive to Allah.

    You’ve got to get down on that prayer rug and plead, beg and cry to Allah for His help.

  • Alison

    December 7, 2016

    A much needed reminder easier said than done I realize I cause myself so much pain by imagining and believing stories in my head about Co and hubby I know its wrong but can’t seem to stop at times other times am good others am stuck in a funk….