How to Live Polygamy in Peace

Every woman who is in a polygamous marriage wants to know how to live polygamy in peace. Some women have a more difficult time in a polygamous marriage than others. We all are different. Husbands aren’t the same either. We all come from various walks of life, not to mention the cultural differences, as well.

To answer how to live polygamy in peace, there is a lot that we must consider. Not only is everyone not a Muslim, but some Muslims have non-Muslim spouses. Furthermore, some Muslims don’t even live Islam. There are Muslims who admit to not practicing their religion. So, with that said, how to live polygamy in peace is not an easy question to answer, especially when not everyone is on the same page.

The only way to know how to live polygamy in peace is to know the meaning of life

The meaning of life is in the Quran and no place else. Thus, it’s a waste of time to look for it elsewhere. The Quran is the road map to our journey’s end. All that we need to know is in it. It is a guide and a mercy for those who believe. It leads us out of the darkness and into the light. To read it is not to only say words. But one must see how it relates to us today, which it does.

Most women who are in a polygamous marriage are lost. They walk about blindly, feeling their way around. They don’t know what to do, and they look for help in all the wrong places.

The women ask their family and friends, many of whom are non-Muslims, for help. The people whom they ask don’t know the truth about our way of life, nor do they care to know. Only those who themselves don’t know the truth would ask others who don’t know for help. Many of the Muslims are of little help, as well. It’s because they don’t know what belief is all about. One can only learn it from the Quran.

A Muslim woman will not know how to live polygamy in peace, if she asks those who do not know what is in the Quran. A person has to read the Quran to know what is in it. It’s important to realize that Allah teaches. She must ask Allah for understanding and for guidance. It’s the only way to become a believer.

I can tell you how to live polygamy in peace

If one does what I stated above, She will have it not only in a polygamous marriage, but in life itself. Moreover, she will have peace and contentment like never before. A wife in a polygamous marriage will live life with joy and happiness. Of course, she will have ups and downs, and some days that are easier than others.

A Muslim will still be tested and tried. However, if she follows the advice above, she will win through in times of trouble, distress, and calamities. She will know to turn to Allah and not to created things for help. After all, Allah created us. Turn to the Creator. Most importantly, she must remember Allah, as Allah only remembers those who remember Him.

Life is beautiful when one depends on Allah. It goes without saying that a wife will come to like life, if she obeys Allah. She must like life for life to like her.  A woman can have peace in a polygamous marriage. Most importantly she will have hope to enter Paradise. She won’t lose sight of what is most important. The next life is what really matters. This life is a probationary period. It is fleeting. Indeed, it is short. With it all said, now you have the answer to how to live polygamy in peace.

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  • anabellah

    January 4, 2016


    Ditto!!! Nice post! I agree with you 100%.

  • Heart

    January 4, 2016

    Dear Ana

    I believe that we as woman deplete ourselves in that we make a man our entire world and are too nice.

    We stop doing the things we love eg if you enjoyed reading or baking classes or whatever it is.

    We should never lose ourselves. Men don’t. They continue to do the things they always did.

    We become more attractive to a man when we are not on his neck all the time.

    Similarly in a polygamous relationship a woman who focuses on being who she is and keeps herself busy with Allah and the things she enjoys doing Will find that she will have peace, and the respect of her husband as most important to her is Allah and her happiness.

    So stay nice but speak up and own your own mind.

  • anabellah

    December 28, 2015

    Dear Heart,

    Long time no hear from. It’s good to hear from you. I’m well. Thank you. You must be too, Alhumdulliah!

    You brought up a very good point. Most talk is about what it’s like being in a polygamous marriage. There is very little talk about the stress a person undergoes in anticipation of the marriage. Stress is a killer. The stress from dealing with a polygamous marriage is like none other, beside coping with a critical illness, I suppose. Knowing a husband will marry another could be far more stressful on a wife than when she’s actually is in the polygamous marriage. Fear of the unknown and all of Satan’s whispers could become overwhelming for her.

    I don’t think men in general are good communicator. Women expect them to communicate the way women do. They are a whole another animal. Most of them communicate through sex. It’s how they express their love. Not all, of course. Nothing is absolute except Allah.

    Satan’s whispers are the ultimate. If a woman can’t get the thought waves of her mind under control, she is doomed. The only way she’ll do it is if she seeks refuge in Allah the way He tells us to.

    Nice post, Heart!

  • Heart

    December 28, 2015

    Dear Ana

    Hope you are well.

    I believe that an important left out facet which affects peace is the emotional stress before entering into a polygamous marriage and during same which affects health negatively.

    This emotional stress is caused a lot by the husbands lack of communication and shaytaans little whispers.

  • anabellah

    December 25, 2015

    Malayekah, Wa Alaikum As Salaam

    I’m happy to hear you have found the Post/thread to be a “beneficial reminder”. It is always good to hear that the posts/threads written here are helpful. It is a way to stay conscious of Allah.

    You mentioned it could be a disaster, if a Muslim man is married to a Muslim woman and to a non-Muslim woman, as well, because the non-Muslim woman doesn’t know Islam and doesn’t know to turn to Allah for guidance. I have found from being on this blog since it’s birth in February 2009 (nearly 7 years) there are many Muslims who don’t know Islam and don’t know to turn to Allah for guidance the same as with the non-Muslims. I have seen very little difference between the two. Many walk the walk and talk the talk, but they don’t have the knowledge

  • Malayekah

    December 25, 2015

    AS salam Alaikum.

    Very beneficial reminder. We all know it but it’s good sometimes to find a reminders and just read through and refresh the mind. I think if polygyny is between Muslim man and woman and the other wife isn’t, that brings on disaster. She doesn’t know Islam , she won’t turn to Allah for guidance if her jealousy or behaviour goes out of hand , it’s so much harder for her and others involved.