Do you know how some men engage unjustly in polygamy? I’m sure you do. Just from listening to commentators here at polygamy 411, I know how they do it.
Many of the men are so busy trying to get what they want, when they want it and how they want it. It’s to the point that they don’t see the wrong that they do in the marriages. I’d like to look at polygamy from a positive view, but it’s so hard when I see so much wrong connected to it.
I’ll give you an example. Men engage unjustly in polygamy when financially the government takes care of the men’s wives for them. The men live with their wives who each have their own separate dwelling, but don’t take care of them monetarily. Even if the government doesn’t take care of their wives, the wives may work to take care of themselves. Life is not so burdensome for a polygamous man when he neglects his financial responsibilities. He just goes slumming, so to speak.
Men engage unjustly in polygamy when they don’t give the one wife her nights and full rights, but give them to the other wife
For instance, the husbands usually do it because they haven’t let the first wives know that they have married again. The first wives didn’t know their husbands were deceitful and lied while all the time becoming polygamous. Mainly men have made the other wives “secret wives,” somewhat like mistresses. The husbands deprive such women of financial help or their right to spend nights with their husbands.
Men engage unjustly in polygamy when they fear their first wives. In essence, they make their first wives a lord. The other wives barely receive their rights, as the first wives and their wishes are the husband’s priority. Husbands lean towards the favorite wives and neglect the other wives. They clearly disregard some of their wives. Then why did they bother to become polygamous to begin with?
Men engage unjustly in polygamy when they have all their wives living together, as well. The living arrangement is to save money. They may do it to fulfill their fantasy of having a harem. Perhaps they do it to engage in unlawful acts of sex with all the wives together. It wasn’t the way of our beloved Prophet Muhammad (PBUH), and it’s not the way that Muslims should live.
Some men don’t do anything the way that they should do it based on Islam. They simply exercise the privilege of engaging in polygamy with no thought of Islam. Some use polygamy as a cover for an “affair.” There are men who tend to jump at a chance to live polygamy, and it’s the only part of Islam that they care about. It’s just a way to have many women at one time.
Men engage unjustly in polygamy and it’s not the Islamic way
Many men who engage in polygamy don’t have honorable reasons to. Some honorable reasons are: to help a widow; to help a divorced woman; to help a single mom with orphans, or such. They don’t think of polygamy in terms of what it was about for our beloved Prophet Muhammad (PBUH). He lived a polygamous lifestyle later in his life with the purpose to worship and serve Allah. He lived it to bring others together to propagate Islam.The Prophet Muhammad had his eyes on Paradise.
There is a difference in how he lived his polygamous life and the way that the men of today who engage in polygamy live theirs’. All of the Prophets of Allah are our examples. The men of today have much to learn about their religion Islam, which includes polygamy. To act justly is paramount for all in all things.
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