Muslim Men Marry Women Who Are Not Muslim

Muslim men marry women who are not Muslim

Some Muslim men marry women who are not Muslim. It happens in polygamous and monogamous marriages, and it’s not okay. They think that the non-Muslims who live today are “People of the Book”, but they aren’t. Muslims should marry Muslims. It doesn’t matter if the marriage is polygamous or monogamous. Allah does not give Muslims permission to marry non-Muslims. It makes no sense to think that Allah allows such a thing.

Allah gave specific “Books” (revelations) to His Prophets at certain times in history. Some accepted His Prophets and followed His “Books”, and others did not. It has been that way since the beginning of time. The last “Book” that Allah sent to mankind was the Holy Quran. He sent it to His last Prophet who was the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH).

Before the man marries, he should ask himself if the woman accepts and follows the Holy Quran? Since the time that the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) received the revelation and till this very day, the Quran is the “Book” for all to follow. All on this planet is to accept the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH). He was the last messenger that Allah sent to us and is our example. All of Allah’s other Prophets whom He mentioned in the Holy Quran are our example, as well. The same as throughout history with the earlier Prophets, there are some who will accept the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) and his “Book”. There are others who won’t.

Those who don’t accept the Holy Quran and don’t accept the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) are unbelievers. They defy and reject Allah and reject faith. Common sense would let a Muslim know that Allah never said they could marry those who defy and reject Him. It’s that simple.

Those who say Islam lets Muslim men marry women who are not Muslim in polygamous marriages or any marriage, as they are people of the Book, are wrong

Specifically, the “People of the Book” were those who lived before Allah gave the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) the revelation, the Holy Quran. Those people (“People of the Book”) believed in the Gospel revealed to Prophet Jesus (PBUH) and believed in the Torah revealed to Prophet Moses (PBUH). They all believed in the One God.

The information in those “Books” was the same as what is in the Quran. The only difference is Allah left out of the Quran that which was no longer needed. Furthermore, He included in the Quran what we need that was not in His earlier “Books.” The Quran is a complete and replete Book. It’s important to realize that the Bible and the Torah that people have today are not the original Books. In other words, they are not the Books that the people had before Allah gave Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) the Holy Quran.

Allah, in the Quran, makes clear who the “People of the Book” were. Muslims are not supposed to marry non-believers until they believe. Nonetheless, in polygamous marriages, Muslim men marry women who are not Muslim, and it says a lot about them.

In conclusion, may Muslim men marry women who are not Muslim in hope that one day they will become one?

The answer is, no! It’s plain and simple. Allah decided who will be Muslim and who won’t. We don’t decide. A husband can’t make his wife a Muslim. Do some Muslims do what Allah says don’t do? The answer is, yes. As a result, they will suffer for it in this life and in the Hereafter.

Please note: Please only comment about the topic on this page. Please discuss other topics in the assigned “Discussions” area.

Muslim men marry women who are not Muslim

Books about polygamy in Islam


Share article on

Don't Be Shy. Leave a Reply

* Denotes Required Field

https://polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_bye.gif  https://polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_good.gif  https://polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_negative.gif  https://polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_scratch.gif  https://polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_wacko.gif  https://polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_yahoo.gif  https://polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_cool.gif  https://polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_heart.gif  https://polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_rose.gif  https://polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_smile.gif 
https://polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_whistle3.gif  https://polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_yes.gif  https://polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_cry.gif  https://polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_mail.gif  https://polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_sad.gif  https://polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_unsure.gif  https://polygamy411.com/wp-content/plugins/wp-monalisa/icons/wpml_wink.gif 
 

29 Comments

  • anabellah

    August 28, 2015

    I looked up the video that Lee mentioned. I watched the trailer. Insha Allah, I’ll watch the full documentary later today, when I have more time. For those interested in it the link is as follows:

  • anabellah

    August 26, 2015

    As Salaamu Alaikum, Sis Ummof4

    Thank you for your post to Lee,

  • ummof4

    August 26, 2015

    As-salaamu alaikum and hello to all,

    Lee, please read or reread the purpose of this blog. We will not discuss with you what you find wrong about Islaam, Pakistan or any other place. We will not discuss with you what is wrong in American culture either. This blog is about and for people with a positive interest in polygamy.

    Please leave us alone and find another place to vent about your negative feelings about Islaam and Muslims.

  • anabellah

    August 26, 2015

    Lee,

    I really don’t see how one has anything to do with another. What do you want here? You aren’t Muslim and don’t appear to want to be. You don’t agree with the religion Islam, so why are you here? Do you want to be a pain in the @$$ for someone. Take it some place else. No one has time for it here. You seem to have a lot of free time on your hands to aggravate someone. Go find yourself a useful hobby or something. Do something constructive with your life.

    Listen, I’m trying to get some sleep. You’re disrupting my shuteye time. If you send another post through, it won’t get approved for a few hours (until I get up). Maybe you could find another site in the mean time so you can work someone else nerves. Good luck!

  • Lee

    August 26, 2015

    Allowing men to have up to 4 wives but making their own wives covered from head to toe! How is that fair? Drivers from Peshawar raping young boys on the street? Where’s Allah to protect them?watch this documentary…

    Google. Pakistan’s hidden shame

  • anabellah

    August 26, 2015

    Lee,

    You apparently aren’t Muslim or Pakistani, so I suppose it shouldn’t really concern you. Thank anyhow for letting us know what you think. Have a good day!

  • Lee

    August 26, 2015

    What a racist culture that is so controlled by a religion. Muslims take Islam way too seriously, my god like covering themselves in 40 degree heat..

  • anabellah

    August 25, 2015

    @GodIsMyLife,

    I just need to mention that a major difference between Islam and other “religions”, is Islam doesn’t allow for opinion and people’s views that are not based on Islamic teachings.

    Islam is about submission to Allah’s will, which many Muslim don’t know. Many Muslims fail to realize that if they submit their will to Allah, they no longer have a will. Yet, some Muslims still want to come forward with their opinions based on their feelings, wants and desire. They don’t use the Quran that Allah has given us as a Mercy and a guide.

    Allah says those who are moved by desire have a diseased heart. Yet, most people talk about what they want, when they want it and how they want it.

  • anabellah

    August 25, 2015

    @GodIsMyHeart,

    It’s really nice that you and your husband can open up and talk honestly with each other. It’s so nice he listened to you, and agreed that he shouldn’t approach you with his thoughts of you being intimate with another man. He didn’t take offense. It’s really good.

    One of the things you said that I agree with was: ” But I reminded him that we can follow God or we can go the other way, away from God, and there really is no middle ground. To that, he agreed.” I am with you that there is no middle ground. In the Quran, Allah lets us know there really are only Believers or unbelievers. I find in many Muslim I read about or know of from a distance they think being a Muslim is all about what they look like, the clothes they wear, the certain Arabic phrases they say, and what they do such as which hand to eat with and things of that nature. They leave out the most important part – belief in what Allah says in the Holy Quran. A believer must have the correct belief in Allah, accompanied with righteous deeds (charity, fasting, eating Halal foods, especially prayer five times a day, Hajj if one can afford it (going on a vacation lets one know it’s money that could go towards preparing for the pilgrimage) etc.

    Did your husband say why the woman whom he was going to marry left him, other than that you reached out to her and she didn’t like it? Are you married to him or not? You had mentioned that he said you are not his wife. It’s important for you to know straight up whether you are or not, right?

  • GodIsMyHeart

    August 25, 2015

    Ana,

    I did start an honest dialogue with my husband last night about that a wife should obey her husband in everything except if he asks her to go against God. And I said that I thought that asking a wife to have sex or even flirt with another man was not what God would want a husband to do. And my husband agreed. He said he knows he has an issue, and he was just being honest about his feelings, when he said that. Honesty is good, and shows me he is not as separated from reality as my previous husbands who hid everything. But, I asked him to be careful about the things he says to me. I thanked him for giving me advice always to follow God. Sometimes he gives very good advice on spiritual matters. But I reminded him that we can follow God or we can go the other way, away from God, and there really is no middle ground. To that, he agreed. Today, I start a school project, because, ironically, I am actually taking a course right now in my art therapy masters program on Addictions. To get a feeling for how an addict feels and how hard it is to retrain yourself to stop a behavior, we have to give something up for thirty days.
    I do not have any substance addictions, not cigarettes, or even chocolate or food or coffee. So, I have decided to give up extraneous speech. My one thing I wish I could stop is to always open my big mouth. When I told my husband this, he laughed. He is really looking forward to this time, when he doesn’t have to listen to any of my lectures! LOL!!!

    In closing, I would just say that in reference to the issue of whether a Muslim man should marry a non-Muslim woman, I am, again, a very open-minded person, and I feel that people make too much out of the differences in how people worship God. To me, God is like a great beautiful diamond, but so big that we are all sitting around looking up at Him, and we can only see one side, not all the sides. I therefore, ascribe to the belief that it is a person’s heart that makes them a good husband or wife, not their religion. And I am glad my husband thinks that, too. I do not think he was attracted to me because he thought I was loose. I was obviously a church lady, and very modest in dress and behavior. He said he married me because he thought I was quiet and a prayer lady. A lot of people who struggle with issues of addiction, or sexuality, choose nice wives and have normal families, and the addictive behavior is kept separate from the people they love. It is like they are trying to get balance between the darkness and the light. The fact that my husband has bridged this gap, by sharing his dark desires with me, may be a good thing, because the issue is out in the open now, it can be faced, and we can work on it together.

    He let me lay down with him yesterday afternoon, on the couch, and just hold him, and last night, he let me lay next to him for a few minutes again and hug him, and he kind of hugged my arm. When we reduce away everything else, we are all damaged in some way, and it is really not for us to judge each other, but to try to help each other and love each other, and let God be the judge.

    Thanks Ana.
    GodIsMyHeart

  • anabellah

    August 25, 2015

    @GodIsMyHeart,

    Hello. I finally got a chance to read all of your posts on all the threads that you wrote on. I now can totally see and understand why your husband does not want you to become Muslim, especially after you said he got excited by the thought of you being sexual with your male Muslim roommate and he encouraged you to seduce the roommate. It dawned on me. He does not want a Muslim wife, at least not in you. When he married you, apparently you were exactly what he wanted. You probably still are, but he wants his freedom. He wants you to continue to be the way you are.

    If you take the Shahadah (vow to be Muslim) and learn Islam, he would no longer have what attracted him to you to begin with. He would no longer have what he desired in you. You surely would change, if you were sincere in your covenant with Allah. You’d dress differently, modestly, find what you once thought was acceptable, repelling. You’d not worship your husband any longer. You’d begin to tell him what is right and wrong, perhaps. You’d let him know the male couldn’t live with the two of you any longer. You would know when to listen to him and when not to.

    A Muslim woman is not to just blindly obey her husband. A Muslim woman is to obey a Believing husband (a husband who is a Believer). A Muslim woman who is a Believer would know whether her husband is a Believer or not. Allah tells us NOT to obey ANYONE who neglects the remembrance of Him. As I stated, a Muslim may not know who to listen to and not to listen to, but a believer would.

    The term “Sex Addict” has been used on the blog a number of times. Your husband is the first one that I, without a doubt, would say seems to fit the profile. To have been married or gone through six wives, what he wants you to do with another man, and other things you’ve said, suggests he’s got a serious problem. I think he knows it, too, which is why he prays so much. He probably gets disgusted with himself.

    There are Muslim men who don’t want Muslim women. They want to be able to get their freak on with non-Muslim women, knowing most are very sexually active and have a lot of experience with men. Perhaps the women would sit and watch porn with them and engage in the same activity they watch in the film or film their own sex acts. They may engage in anal sex.

    My wali had let me know years ago that many Muslim men don’t want Muslim women. They want the non-Muslim experienced women who are freaky and free when it come to sex. Men from foreign countries coming to the U.S, UK, European countries looking for women who are not chaste or modest. They want the wild ones, the ones who have no limitations.

    Other than the above, there is not much I could add to what I think of that you wrote. He’s got some serious issues. Where do you go from here with him? I dunno…I haven’t the foggiest idea. Beats the crap out of me.

  • anabellah

    August 24, 2015

    @GodIsMyHeart,

    My response to you was a bit long and I had twisted my words up a bit about the “People of the Book” I had to go back and straighten it out. I’ve been writing quickly lately, and making a lot of mistakes smh

    There are some ayat (verses in the Quran) that lets a Muslim know it is not enough for anyone to believe in one God and it’s the only thing that matters. He says:

    Say: “We believe in Allah, and in what has been revealed to us and what was revealed to Abraham, Isma’il, Isaac, Jacob, and the Tribes, and in (the Books) given to Moses, Jesus, and the prophets, from their Lord: We make no distinction between one and another among them, and to Allah do we bow our will (in Islam).” Quran: Surah 3, ayah 84

    “If anyone desires a religion other than Islam (submission to Allah), never will it be accepted of him; and in the Hereafter He will be in the ranks of those who have lost (All spiritual good).” Quran: Surah 3, ayah 85

  • anabellah

    August 24, 2015

    @GodIsMyHeart,

    Thank you for sharing with us your thoughts on Muslim men and their marriage to non-Muslim women. I could see how you came to the conclusion you did. You are not Muslim. If you believed in the Islamic faith and that the Quran is the word of Allah who is God, revealed to the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) by way of the Angel Gabriel, you, yourself, would be Muslim. You believe differently than Muslim/Believers.

    It’s okay. Although it is okay, I beg to differ. Why? Because I go with what Allah says in the Holy Quran and He is God and He says it is not okay for any Muslim to marry an unbeliever. A Believer is one who accepts the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) and all that is in the Holy Quran.

    When the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) was given the revelation, ALL (every single) living person were and is to follow him. There are no exceptions. When Allah took the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) back to Him, those living after he left this earth were to follow the Holy Quran. Allah protected the Holy Quran from corruption. It is the only Book He ever protected from corruption. The people living when the original Torah, Gospels and other books were revealed, changed the words of those Books. Allah, therefore, took it upon Himself to protect the Holy Quran so the same thing would not happen to it.

    Allah in the Holy Quran says that people living during the time of the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) were the “People of the Book” – they believed in the one GOD.They were to follow the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH). Those Muslims could marry the “People of the Book” – people living before the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) received the revelation. It why he married some Christians and Jews. Trust me – All those people – The People of the Book – are dead now. They all had the same belief. The message in the Quran is the same that was in Allah’s previous, original Books – The Torah, The Gospel and other of His Book revealed to His Prophets mentioned in the Holy Quran.

    With it said, EVERY SINGLE PERSON ON THE FACE OF THIS EARTH is to accept Allah’s Prophet (the Prophet Muhammad PBUH), along with all of Allah’s Prophets and they are to follow the Holy Quran,

    NO Muslim may marry an unbeliever. Only a Muslim can be a Believer. Allah specifically tells Muslim men and women not to marry unbelievers until they believe. He tells Muslims that non-Muslims WILL lead Muslims astray. They beckon believers to the Hell Fire. The entire Quran lets a Believer know Allah does not allow such a marriage.

    Everyone on the face of the planet is to accept the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) as Allah’s last Messenger, seal of the Prophets and the Holy Quran as His last Book. Anyone who does not is a rejecter of faith/unbeliever.

    I don’t know why your husband wouldn’t encourage you to do as Allah says. He disobeys Allah by being married to you. Muslims who think Muslim are allowed to marry non-Muslim are totally clueless.

  • GodIsMyHeart

    August 24, 2015

    Okay, Ana, You have many good things to say on all topics, but I think you are wrong about this one. A Muslim man may marry a Christian or a Jew or a Muslim woman. The reason for this is twofold. First, all these three believe in the One True God, and these three religions are a continuum, a historical timeline, and not separate traditions. Whether they have come to the faith through an older holy book or a newer one, an older prophet, or a later one, does not change the fact that Abraham, Jesus, or Muhammed were but men, and but God is God. God is the important part of a Muslim’s belief system, more important than the Quran. The Quran may be considered an extension of God, but not God, himself. So, if a woman and a man both believe in God, that is the important thing, not how advanced their belief or religious system is. An older belief, such as Judaism, could evolve nicely into Christianity, or into the practice of Islam. Secondly, your stance about men should not marry a woman who is non-Muslim hoping she will convert to Islam has some merit, but it is not a reason to not marry. It has some merit, based on psychology, because you should never marry a person expecting they will change about anything. That is setting yourself up for disapointment, and is not fair to the other person, either. However, if a Muslim man marries a woman who believes in God, and that woman is pious and goes to Synagogue or church and follows the ten commandments, he might be the best person to help her really step up her game and commit to a life of prayer and true devotion, which could end up in her converting to Islam. The God-fearing Muslim man who is the good Imam for his home, and is praying regularly and at all times, and following his religion in spirit as well as in the law, will have a great effect on a woman who believes in God and is trying to live a good Jewish or Christian life, because those religions do not have the committment to prayer and to total devotion that Muslims do. I have noticed that this is something about my husband’s religion that I would like to bring into my life, and I have thought about converting, and I tried the prayers for a while, but then reciting in Arabic didn’t really speak to me. I had a translation book, but it still wasn’t really meaningful to me. Also, my husband was critical of me. He kept saying, you are not Muslim, stop trying to be Muslim. I guess he thought I was doing it wrong, or trying to do it just because he was doing it, and he decided that would be bad for me, spiritually. But, you know, from my previous posts, that my husband has a sensitivity chip missing. I think if I had been with a Muslim man who treated my conversion with care and did not stress me out about how I was doing things while I was learning, I would have ended up converting. It was weird for me, at the time, because it was like he wanted me to be a Muslim, but he didn’t at the same time. Maybe this is connected in some way to the idea that you are either a Muslim or you are not, and God decides that. But that attitude shows very little tolerance for the conversion process. And aren’t we all on this Earth to help each other convert our hearts, more and more each day to what God wants from us? All life is conversion, really. Finally, my husband, because he has no patience, but he saw my intention was good, said it didn’t matter if I stayed Christian, because God really only cares about our hearts, and, he said, my heart is pure.
    The thing about being the Imam for the home is that this enables a man to have a wife who is not Muslim, without any danger to his spiritual practice, because he is not looking to anyone else for his spiritual guidance, but to God alone, and, as I said above, through his practice, he could end up leading a woman to become a Muslim, too. The woman, on the other hand, who is Muslim, should not marry a non-Muslim man, because then there is no leader or spiritual head to lead her in her faith practice. And, because women devote themselves to their husbands, and are also called upon to focus on a lot of physical stuff, like kids and food and the house, it is easy to get bogged down in the material, and lose connection with the spiritual. I get so caught up in daily life, but my husband never ever forgets to pray. It is an act of incredible focus and will, that he can constantly stop in his day at the exact right time to pray. It means he is just continually thinking about it and about God at all times.
    I would like to see any busy mother with babies and meals to cook and a house to take care of stay focused all day on God, down to the minute. I am sure some do, but I do not think it is as common. I feel like when I had my first child, I got a form of adult ADD. It’s like mothers have to cope with their minds being split in different directions, because the children come from our bodies, so they carry a little piece of us wherever they go. It is a normal and happy distraction, because we love our children, but it makes me see the role of the man in carrying the spiritual or religious impulse for the family. Men are uniquely suited to this kind of focus. So, they should be able to carry their own with a wife who is a practicing and pious Jew or Christian and I do not think there is a danger to them spiritually from that kind of wife.

  • anabellah

    May 12, 2015

    I was just reading the Quran and read an ayah that speaks of the “People of the Book”. There are many, ayat, but the one I just read, lets us know that the “People of the Book” were to believe in the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH). They were to believe in the revelation (the Holy Quran) that Allah gave the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH). It was the same revelation that the People of the Book had already received. It goes to show that the people who live today that are Christians and Jews are NOT the People of the Book or else they would be Muslim. Everyone today is expected to follow the revelation Allah gave the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH). With regard to polygamy or marriage in general, Muslims are only to marry Muslims. Allah says:

    “O ye People of the Book! Believe in what We have (now) revealed, confirming what was (already) with you, before We change the face and fame of some (of you) beyond all recognition, and turn them hindwards, or curse them as We cursed the Sabbath-breakers, for the decision of Allah must be carried out.” Quran: Surah 4, ayah 47

    As I stated, there are numerous ayat (verses) in the Holy Quran that address the matter of the People of the Book, which clearly lets us know they were the people who had received the Torah and the Gospel before the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) was given the revelation – the Holy Quran.

  • anabellah

    October 9, 2014

    UmmIbrahim, Wa Alaikum As Salaam

    Please join us over on the discussion forum at:

    https://polygamy411.com/october-14-discussions/

    We’d love for you to join in the discussion whenever you have some free time, Insha Allah.

    You asked me a question. Yes. Please read this comment for better understanding. https://polygamy411.com/october-14-discussions/comment-page-1/#comment-238

  • UmmIbrahim

    October 9, 2014

    Salaamu alaikum Sisters

    Thank you Anabellah for welcoming me here (even though like many I dont want to be here!)
    It’s important for me also,like the sisters above mentioned, to have a place to go where the people there understand what you are going through. Too many sisters aren’t very open minded about this topic so it’s hard to really connect with them. Many are against it period no matter what and I am not because I know it has its place in Islam and in the world. The suffering in silence thing is such a killer! I just want a nice humble and understanding sister to talk to who isn’t going to make me feel any worse than I already. Alhamdulillah this blog exists because, like I said earlier, Anabellah emphasizes Allah in all this and nothing else!
    I don’t have as much time as I would like to think more and read more as I have way too many children pulling me whichever way! I would however love to come here more often and get to know you ladies and help each other through this for the sake of Allah inshaAllah.

    I have a question for you Anabellah, is your husband married to a non-Muslim?

    May Allah bless you all!

  • Mari2

    October 8, 2014

    I too understand the suffering in silence bit. That is why this blog is so important to me as it is full of people who have some understanding of polygamy and Islam. Though the posters here have varied experiences, I find it comforting to at least have a venue in which to voice my qualms or frustrations, my happy times, and solicit advice (especially with those whose husbands have similar cultures as mine) without most misunderstanding the basis of polygamy.

    I have a few friends who know M will soon marry his cousin, and I pretty much get “Well, he must not really love you if he’s willing to marry someone else.” I don’t argue their assertion. They don’t get it. One thing that has been an encouragement to me is that the Imam at our masjid has 2 wives. He doesn’t advertise this. It is just known to some. I really like the imam and his khutbas and am really happy with the community there. M’s uncle, chachi and cousins have moved to a new pakistani-style masjid, and have encouraged M to follow. He can go, but I am staying put.

  • Marie

    October 8, 2014

    Asalaamu alaykum all,

    KA126, yes I know the feeling of suffering in silence, when my husband first told me about him wanting to marry another, I had know one, know one that would understand anyway. I knew I’d I told my family they would feel sorry for me an tell me to leave my husband. I didn’t need sympathy, I needed to understand and talk it though, there’s no way you can do that with a non Muslim. I still haven’t told any of my family. I don’t want to hear the Ahhhh you poor thing, heck they felt sorry for me when I went to a family bbq and couldn’t eat the chicken as it wasn’t halal. Lol. I do still have love for my family BUT, I do not like their dis belief, I don’t allow my children to spend a lot of time with them and I myself don’t spend a lot of time with them. We don’t have a lot in common anymore.

  • anabellah

    October 7, 2014

    KA126, Wa Alaikum As Salaam,

    You said something very, very important. You stated, “Your family has developed a resentment against you.”

    It means we’re doing something right. Allah says we love them and they love us not. He says they will never accept us until we follow their way.

    The sister I spoke of in an earlier post was upset with me because she didn’t like my new way of speaking. I deleted her comment. She was going on and on about how she love her non-Muslim relatives and they love her and are so supportive of her and how we could marry them (despite what Allah say) and blah, blah, blah.

    If it’s the case, it means she hasn’t changed much since accepting Islam. She hasn’t accepted Islam. She Muslim in name only and I feel safe and correct in saying so. Allah doesn’t lie. He doesn’t make exceptions. She is like them for them to accept her and continue to love her as though she never reverted.

    I’m not saying our families will disown us or never speak with us again. I am saying there will be a noticeable difference in the communications between the Muslims and non-Muslims. I’m not talking about the superficial. There could never be a real closeness, or the Muslim risks going astray. Allah says they will lead us astray. Many Muslims hate the TRUTH because it’s not to their liking. Allah says in the Quran that people have a hatred for the TRUTH.

    I go with what Allah says…

    Yes, KA126, we have to keep praying; you’re so right. We have to do our part with regard to worshiping Allah and He will see us through all our obstacles and let us pass our tests,learn our lessons and grow in faith. He put the believers together. We’re not alone. It’s all good He will let us be triumphant and victorious.

  • KA126

    October 7, 2014

    As salaamu Alaikum sisters. It has been a while. I have been following the new concept. Still a little confused about it but learning.

    The one dilemma in being a revert is the suffering in silence. The friends you had before don’t understand your new way of life. Your family has developed a resentment against you. You don’t want to keep talking and telling people your business. Even other Muslims may not understand, due to cultural differences. You feel lonely and you suffer in silence. However, hold on to your Deen. Read your Quran and Sunnah. Keep praying to Allah Subhana wa ta’ala. in sha Allah your trial will pass. May Allah Subhana wa ta’ala keep us all on the siratal mustaqeen even when we want to give up. Ameen.

  • anabellah

    October 3, 2014

    ummof4, Wa Alaikum As Salaam,

    Thank you much for the suggestion about how to deal with these posts. Insha Allah, I’ll wait a period before putting out each post. The posts that have no comments under them, I will close out. I would have to leave open the ones with comments under them or else the comments won’t display. The posts/threads never got many comments about the topic, so closing them out shouldn’t prove problematic. People more so just contemplate them, reject them, or accept them.

    Thanks again for your help. Alhumdulliah

  • ummof4

    October 3, 2014

    As-salaamu Alaikum and hello to all,

    Ana, I have a suggestion about the multiple posts. Only have one post open at a time for comments. Keep each post up for a certain amount of time – one week or two weeks. Anyone who wants to comment can do so in that period of time. Then close that post and put up another post. Of course, that means that you may have to discipline yourself to only write only one post a week.

    If you don’t limit it, you will drive yourself crazy. Or it may be like the previous blog, where there were people commenting on posts that had been written years ago.

    Love you all, EED MUBARAK!

  • anabellah

    October 3, 2014

    I don’t know whether it’s going to get crazy with the multiple posts open I’m at a loss as to what to do

  • anabellah

    October 2, 2014

    ummIbrahim, Wa Alaikum As Salaam,

    I appreciate all your kind words and encouragement. I thank Allah swt so much for this site. All praise is definitely due to Him.

    Helping one another is what it should be all about, especially reminding one another to remember Allah and put Him first.

    I’m always happy when Allah sends knew people to our site who all strive for the same goal – to accept Allah’s decisions with our eyes set on meeting Him one day in Jannah/Paradise. I’m so happy you are here and Insha Allah, it will become your home here too, as we are a blog family.

    I’m in the midst of writing a follow up post that Insha Allah, will be helpful, as well. You’re definitely on the right track about what to do. The best you could do is as you said -PRAY – patience, perseverance and prayer is what will get us where we need to be. Welcome, Sis ummIbrahim

    @Mari2, As Salaamu Alaikum,

    Good to hear you are okay. Alhumdulliah, I will be back, Insha Allah, to read your posts, ASAP. Right now, I’m trying to get another post out before I call it a night. By golly, I’m beginning to feel sleepy at a normal hour. It’s a beautiful thing

  • Mari2

    October 2, 2014

    Fatima,
    I too was raised as a Catholic, and while I bucked against certain traditions/theology (trinity) in Catholicism, I did/do have a love of the old testament stories. So while I was a “lapsed Catholic” by tradition, my love of OT, my desire to learn more of the stories of the old prophets, and my ancient history/hebrew education (thank you catholic school) were actually a natural segue into Islam. Learning about Islam filled in the gaps of my OT education. As a revert, the Quran upon first reading was familiar in a comforting way. The stories and the people differed little from the OT I grew up with. The only difference is the Quran completes the story begun in the OT. It is the final chapter of the OT. No NT needed. But I never liked the NT anyway.

  • UmmIbrahim

    October 2, 2014

    Salaamu alaikum

    First off let me just say that this website is awesome and may Allah reward you for you efforts in easing the pain for those of us experiencing this!!

    I love how you, Anabellah, always bring it back to Allah and Islam MashaAllah. I know and you know that without that connection with our Lord then all this would just be too painful to bear and live through SubhanAllah.

    So thank you for everything you do!

    And ironically this post relates to my situation so much as I just found out my husband is trying to get married to a Christian woman and I don’t even have words to really describe what that feels like! I don’t know what else I can do besides pray to Allah which is probably the Best thing I can do right now anyway. Allahu Akbar.

    JazakAllah khair sister Ana!

  • anabellah

    October 2, 2014

    Hi Fatima,

    Thank you much for sharing with us about how it was that you became Muslim. I agree with you 100% that deep down we know when a religion is right for us. It takes no convincing whatsoever. I too knew almost instantaneously.

    Isn’t life so much easier when we know the truth? Life takes on a whole new meaning. A life once that was meaningless becomes meaningful.

    Everyone on the planet struggles, but our struggle is easier. we cope way better than most. It’s a beautiful thing…

  • ~Fatima~

    October 2, 2014

    Hi Ana..
    Great discussion topic.. I personally was born and raised Catholic..But along the way of my life was introduced to different religions.. But deep down you know when you feel a religion is right for you..After I met Habeeb, a year before we married, he intoduced me to Islam.. it felt right.. It felt good.
    Before our marriage I took islamic classes while I was in Malaysia, yet then my husband (we werent married yet) and I had separate rooms till our marriage..
    I converted to Islam in 2004 .. I was a muslim before our marriage.. I dont celebrate christmas even though all my years growing up I did with my family.
    There can be a lot of differences also in bringing up children..
    I go to the mosque and I use to go to the catholic church.. My life has changed in many ways.. Ive learned that giving is a great thing and not ecspecting anything in return or to be recognized for the act..
    Ive learned to have patience and to trust in Allah when all seems defeated because he already has plan for us.. Were just living out his plan as he gave us already. ( I learned this from you Ana)

    Life is as it is…

    Its warm today.. but I hear rain is headed my way with some cooler weather!