It is common for a wife to ask: Should I love my polygamous husband less? It’s a good question. However, to answer it, one must know what it means to love someone not as much. Can it be done?
First, for the love to subside, one ought to know that a person can’t simply say: Self, stop loving your husband so much. You love him too much.
One can’t will oneself to stop loving someone, nor does it make sense to try. It’s because Allah controls the heart. He puts the love in it, and only He can remove it or change it.
If a woman were to ask me if she should love her husband less, I’d ask, less than what? Less than she loves him already? She should love her husband less, if she loves him more than she loves Allah.
No one should love anyone or anything more than she loves Allah. If she loves her husband more than she loves Allah, then it’s a problem. Certainly, she needs to love her husband less because Allah should come first.
If she asks, should I love my polygamous husband less, she needs to see if she loves him more than she loves Allah
How should she figure it? Well, she should ask herself what she thinks of the most. Is it her husband or Allah? Who does she remember the most? If it’s her husband, then she has a problem. If her husband or her co-wife or the children or anything else is the first thing that comes to her mind, it is not a good thing.
A wife should try to please Allah. It’s not about the husband. She can test herself by checking her thoughts. She should think about Allah. A wife could receive rewards from Allah for putting Him first.
For one to love someone or something more than Allah is to make the person or thing a god. Allah says put nothing and no one before Him. There is only One God and it’s Allah. She should make Him the focal point.
We’ve dealt with the question, should I love my polygamous husband less, now, how does she do it?
She needs to know that to love her husband less doesn’t mean that she must mistreat him or abuse him in any way. She should still be kind, respectful and loving to him while still loving Allah more.
Once she finds that she loves Allah more, she may find that her marriage gets better. She may have a deeper, more profound and intense love for her husband than she’s ever had before. Her husband shows her more love. When we turn to Allah and away from His creation, Allah turns His creation towards us.
A wife needs to turn to Allah, and ask Him to let her love Him more than anything in the world. She needs to stay focused on Allah and always check her thoughts.
Allah remembers those who remember Him. Remembrance of Allah is the greatest thing in life without doubt.
Please comment on this page about the subject of the article only.
Share article on